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Wow that is big.   Who gets to eat it?

eet's mine juu mether fackers....!!!

OH NOOO!!!! We all need to get our Muslamic ray guns!   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIPD8qHhtVU

Quote:
Immigration officer sacked for putting wife he didn't like on terror watch list


An immigration officer put his own wife on a terrorist watch list – ­so she could not get home from a trip to Pakistan.

The officer was so sick of his partner that when she was visiting family overseas he added her name to the register of people banned from flights into the UK.

When she went to the airport to get her return flight back, officials told her she could not board the plane and did not ­explain why.

She called her husband, who ­promised to look into it – but left her stuck in Pakistan for THREE YEARS. He was sacked after bosses found out about his antics.

An immigration source said: “A lot of people may dislike their other halves but to do this takes it to the next level. Needless to say she was confused when she got to the airport as she had never been involved in anything criminal or terrorist related.

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“She obviously thought her husband, being an immigration officer, would be able to find out what was going on. Little did she know it was him who had put her on the list. By all accounts he then had the time of his life.â€

The officer worked with a unit that puts terror and criminal suspects on the watch list of people “not conducive to the public goodâ€. He simply had to log on to a computer database to add his wife as a ­potential suspect.

The officer was caught out when bosses vetted him after he went for a promotion that required him to have a higher level of security clearance. They realised his wife was on the watch list and asked him for an explanation. ­He had no choice but to confess what he had done – and was fired.

The immigration source added: “He may have lost his job but he is bit of a legend in immigration circles. It will be talked about for years as the officer who hated his wife so much he put her on a watch list.â€

A spokesman for the UK Border Agency, based in Croydon, Surrey, said: “We expect the highest ­levels of integrity. ­Allegations of misconduct are ­thoroughly ­investigated and we ­always take ­action swiftly where we find members of staff who have abused their ­position. On the extremely rare occasions where this occurs, the strongest action is taken.â€





lol that's one way to deal with a nagging wife!!
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A BRITISH woman aged 20 has died after allegedly flying to the US to get silicone injections in her buttocks.

 

The young tourist, who has not yet been named by police but is believed to be a college student, reportedly died in Philadelphia in the early hours of yesterday morning.

 

The papers, filed after police applied for a search warrant for the hotel, also state the woman had flown to the US with three other friends from the UK on February 5.

 

An autopsy has not yet been completed.

 

Detective Tanya Little of the Philadelphia Police Department confirmed: "There is an investigation into the death of a British tourist who died after receiving a procedure at a local hotel.

 

"We are not releasing her name until her next of kin have been notified in the UK."

 

One of the women had undergone buttock-enhancement in Philadelphia last November and brought three of her friends to receive the same butt-implant procedures in hotel rooms this week, the court documents add.

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Cool

 

Quote:
MOVIE hero Arnold Schwarzenegger has sent a lightning bolt through Hollywood by declaring: "I'm back."

Arnie — famed for his line "I'll be back" in the hit movie Terminator — has more time on his hands since standing down as Governor of California last month.

 

And now the star — nicknamed the Governator during his time in office — has told his agent to start looking out for movie roles.

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Malaysia tiger mauling stopped by wife with soup ladle

A man has been rescued from a near-fatal attack by a tiger in northern Malaysia by his wife.

She entered the fray wielding a wooden soup ladle at the tiger - which fled.

Tambun Gediu, now badly lacerated and recovering in hospital, had tried hitting the tiger away in vain and says his wife saved his life.

Wildlife rangers plan to track the tiger and send it further into dense, unpopulated jungle in the the northern state of Perak.
"I was trailing a squirrel and crouched to shoot it with my blowpipe when I saw the tiger.

"That's when I realised that I was being trailed," Mr Gediu said after surgery.

The tiger pounced not far from the Gediu home in a jungle settlement of the Jahai tribe.

Mr Gediu had tried climbing a tree to escape the animal, but was dragged down by the tiger.

His wife, 55-year old Han Besau, rushed out of the kitchen o
n hearing his screams and used the kitchen implement to good effect.

"I was terrified and I used all my strength to punch the animal in the face, but it would not budge," the New Straits Times newspaper quoted him as saying.

"I had to wrestle with it to keep its jaws away from me, and it would have clawed me to death if my wife had not arrived."

It was the first time anyone in the village had been attacked by a tiger.

The director of the Department of Wildlife and National Parks in the state, Shabrina Mohd Shariff, estimated that there were about 200 tigers in the jungles of Perak.

She added that five had been spotted near the major East-West Highway in the region.


yep, its a real drag when a day Blowpiping Squirrels is ruined by a Tiger mauling
lol
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Teenage girl collapses and dies after first kiss

 

A teenager girl collapsed and died from sudden adult death syndrome (SADS) minutes after she was kissed for the first time, an inquest has heard.

 

Jemma Benjamin, 18, was kissed by fellow university student Daniel Ross, 21, at his home after a night out together.

 

But Miss Benjamin suddenly slumped onto the sofa - and died in front of Mr Ross's eyes.

 

The inquest heard Jemma died from SADS, a rare heart condition which kills 500 people in Britain each year.

 

Mr Ross, who had known Miss Benjamin for three months, tried desperately to save her before paramedics arrived on the scene.

 

But the inquest heard nothing could have be done for Miss Benjamin, who was described as a "picture of health".

 

Mr Ross told police that he and Miss Benjamin had been friends for three months - but that was the first time they had kissed.

 

He said: "It was not a sexual relationship but we saw each other a couple of times a week.

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tragic that she has died, and I in no way mean to belittle the story but.....1st kiss at 18!!?? really?? what did she do during her early teenage years?!

 

I went to school with a girl who died aged 17 from the same thing after having sex (don't think it was her 1st time though).

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Bownessie

 

New photo of 'English Nessie' hailed as best yet

 

Pictures of a mysterious creature surfacing from Lake Windermere have been hailed as the best ever sighting of the English Loch Ness Monster, or "Bownessie".

 

The photograph, which shows an object with three humps breaching the surface of the lake, is said to be the best evidence yet of what some claim is a monster lurking beneath the depths.

 

It was taken on a camera phone by Tom Pickles, 24, while kayaking on the lake as part of a team building exercise with his IT company, CapGemini, last Friday.

 

Mr Pickles said he saw an animal the size of three cars speed past him on the lake and watched it for about 20 seconds.

 

He said: “It was petrifying and we paddled back to the shore straight away. At first I thought it was a dog and then saw it was much bigger and moving really quickly at about 10mph.

 

“Each hump was moving in a rippling motion and it was swimming fast.

 

Nessie_1829159c.jpg

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