big-will 7 Posted April 24, 2009 Share Posted April 24, 2009 Well done stem-san. What day do you need requests now you have started that ball rolling? Link to post Share on other sites
sanjo 2 Posted April 24, 2009 Share Posted April 24, 2009 Quote: Her Irish name is Brigit O'malley Is it really?!!?? Link to post Share on other sites
2pints-mate 0 Posted April 24, 2009 Share Posted April 24, 2009 something like that sanjo, good on stemik for rooting that out... Link to post Share on other sites
journey_man 0 Posted April 24, 2009 Share Posted April 24, 2009 stemik may say he's in sales, but secretly he's a political researcher... Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted May 1, 2009 Share Posted May 1, 2009 Forgot the request, though as it's a holiday (but not a holiday). Anyway, any Golden Week jokes? Link to post Share on other sites
stemik 14 Posted May 1, 2009 Share Posted May 1, 2009 One Golden Week a man took the bullet from Tokyo to Osaka. When he got in he said to the ticket man: "Sir. I really need you to do me a favor, I have to get off this train in Nagoya, but I'm very tired and it is for sure that I will fall asleep. So what I want you to do is that you wake me up in Nagoya because I have to meet my family there and it is very important for me. Here you have 10,000 yen for the favor. But I warn you sometimes when people wake me up I get really violent, but no matters what I do or say you got to get me out of this train in Nagoya. Is that clear?" So the ticket man agreed and took the 10,000 yen. Later as the man had said he fell asleep, and when he woke up he realized that he was in Osaka. He was so mad at the ticket man that he ran over and started yelling at the ticket man. "Are you stupid or something??? I paid you 10,000 yen so that you wake me up in Nagoya. And you didn't, so I want my money back!" While the man was yelling at the ticket guy, two other guys that were also in the train were looking at them, so one turns to the other and says to him: Man 1: "Look at this guy! He is mad!" Man 2: "Yeah! He's almost as mad as the guy they made get out of the train in Nagoya." Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 Got this one yesterday - I liked it. I asked my friend's little girl what she wanted to be when she grows up. She said she wanted to be Prime Minister of Australia some day. Both of her parents, Labor supporters, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were Prime Minister what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people." Her parents beamed, and said, "Welcome to the Labor Party!" "Wow...what a worthy goal!" I told her. I continued, "But you don't have to wait until you're Prime Minister to do that. You can come over to my house, mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out. You can give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house." She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me straight in the eye and asked, "Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?" I smiled and said, "Welcome to the Liberal Party." Her parents still aren't speaking to me. Link to post Share on other sites
journey_man 0 Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 that's a goodie! Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 Haha thanks stemik. We must get our request deadline sorted out. How about Wednesday afternoon? Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 cutoff Wednesday would give time for 2 jokes. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 oh no, nobody put in a request. Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Golden Week really messes things up doesn't it. Link to post Share on other sites
yamayamayama 2 Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 Here's one for next week: Naked hikers + naked Smap member. Link to post Share on other sites
stemik 14 Posted May 8, 2009 Share Posted May 8, 2009 ok first the SMAP member... do you know that an old lady told the police about it... One evening three old ladies were sitting on a park bench and SMAP member Kusanagi jumped out of the bushes and with no clothes on! The first lady had a stroke, the second one had a stroke, but the third one's arm was too short to reach. second the naked hikers, shame they are not too young... anyways its breakfast time at the camp site.. "You know, honey," the lady breathlessly says, "My breasts are as hot for you today as ever." "I wouldn't be surprised," replied the guy. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal! Link to post Share on other sites
scouser 4 Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Well done again stem. Link to post Share on other sites
.co.jp 0 Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Next weeks subject: Mathematics and natto. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 hmm... missing something Link to post Share on other sites
gerard 6 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 How about a swine flu theme? Link to post Share on other sites
gerard 6 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 Actually, that's probably too easy. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 struggling with the natto part I guess Link to post Share on other sites
HeatherLocklearRocks 1 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 Request: Heather Locklear. Link to post Share on other sites
stemik 14 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 ok its still friday maths & natto! "Divide fourteen tubs of natto into three bowls of rice so that each bowl has an odd number of natto in it." "That's easy: one, one, and twelve." "But twelve isn't odd!" "It's an odd number of natto to put in a bowl of rice..." sorry it was scraping the barrel Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 Originally Posted By: ger How about a swine flu theme? 2007 - Chinese year of the Chicken - Bird Flu Pandemic devastates parts of Asia 2008 - Chinese year of the Horse - Equine Influenza decimates Australian racing 2009 - Chinese year of the Pig - Swine Flu Pandemic kills hundreds of pigs around the globe. Has any one else noticed? It gets worse........ Next year...... 2010 - Chinese year of the Cock - what could possibly go wrong? (OK OK - so they are not really the right Chinese years - but I thought it was funny when it was sent to me accurate or not...after all since when do we let fact interfere with a good story LOL) Link to post Share on other sites
BagOfCrisps 24 Posted May 16, 2009 Share Posted May 16, 2009 Here's a good Friday joke (Blackpool ad!) Link to post Share on other sites
BagOfCrisps 24 Posted May 16, 2009 Share Posted May 16, 2009 At least you tried stemik Link to post Share on other sites
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