woywoy 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 OK ... here is the deal. What do you do if someone you thought was a good friend has moved in on a girl you really really really like? You have already got rejected by her but still you are not over it and your mate moves in for the kill ... He is now going out with her. She rings you up to tell you as she is a good person but he does not contact you at all. Has SHE betrayed you? Has HE betrayed you? Was he a real friend? How do you deal with these people in the future? Can you be friends? What to do? Link to post Share on other sites
HoTRoD 2 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 Sulk for a while. Time will heal, if you give it a chance. Do you want to be his friend? What sort of time periods are we talking here? Oh so many questions Link to post Share on other sites
Bowler 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 tough one! i say communicate. give the dude a call. see whats up with that! Link to post Share on other sites
mikazooki 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 bin there dun that. m'mate was ditched shortly later tho, so now we are pals. them brain chemicals get all muddly in cases like this, just ride it and see. que sera sera. Link to post Share on other sites
woywoy 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Author Share Posted February 20, 2004 This girl is also a really good friend ... Sort of close to "best friend" material really. Thats what makes it even harder ... I hung out with this guy a bit back home but was never super close. He was more a friend of a friend really. Link to post Share on other sites
miteyak 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 This may sound harsh but... You tried, she kicked you back, you have no claim to her, however you feel. If you think your friend has no right to ask her out (despite the fact its what they both wanted), then it is you who are betraying the friendships. woywoy, contact him, see if he's chill, say that you are. If you're good friends, he's probably feeling bad/embarassed about the whole thing and may not know how to handle it himself. he certainly may not want to rub salt into the wound. If you can't handle the thought of them together yet, keep your distance for a while, but don't let it be you that dumps the friendships over this... Link to post Share on other sites
woywoy 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Author Share Posted February 20, 2004 Yeah I know miteyak. I am not going to throw friendships away over this sort of thing and time will heal it I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
damian 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 Time heals nothing. However heavy drinking, drugs and a generally hedonistic and self destructive attitude should help you on your way. Oh, and don't forget to hate. Hate is good. Get drunk, be bitter, blame everyone, thank nobody. Link to post Share on other sites
HoTRoD 2 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 Time healed in my case, dude. I gave it a chance, and didnt let the situation screw me up. Link to post Share on other sites
miteyak 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 replace the bitterness with a healthy dose of promiscuity. and I'd agree wholeheartedly (and yer in the right place for that...) Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 Sounds like you're just going to have to accept that matey, go for a big night out in Roppongi and find your perfect woman (ahem) Link to post Share on other sites
woywoy 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Author Share Posted February 20, 2004 I think Im agreeing wholeheartedly with db at the moment ... Time is very over-rated in terms of healing powers. The promiscuity thing sounds good as well ... supposedly that is how they get people into that Ralean (?) sect! Link to post Share on other sites
mogski 0 Posted February 20, 2004 Share Posted February 20, 2004 My best freind took a woman I was chasing. He ended up marrying her. I took freindship over a woman. Now we are all freinds I am I drunk most nights. Link to post Share on other sites
Markie 0 Posted February 21, 2004 Share Posted February 21, 2004 That certainly doesn't sound like the "father-to-be" Mogski! Link to post Share on other sites
damian 0 Posted February 21, 2004 Share Posted February 21, 2004 Oh man: My mate got married, I was best man. After the wedding reception I was "with" his heart break ex-gf, who was also at the wedding. Seeing as he was now married I thought he wouldn't need her anymore..... he saw it in much the same light. My gf at the time didn't..... particularly given that she was yet to digest the fact that I slept with 2 hookers the night before the wedding. My mate managed to see the funny side of this, which was great given that he was in fact marrying an ex hooker himself. Potentially he could have thought that it was insensitive for his best man to rock up at his wedding almost directly from a brothel. Since then I am not friends with any of these people, but that has nothing to do with the events of that weekend. My life used to be like a bad movie and man, it was fun. Link to post Share on other sites
mattlucas 0 Posted February 21, 2004 Share Posted February 21, 2004 Punch him in an extremity and get over it. We're not girls here. Sorry to all the girls. Link to post Share on other sites
Siren 0 Posted February 21, 2004 Share Posted February 21, 2004 Bitches come bitches go. Life goes on Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted February 21, 2004 Share Posted February 21, 2004 sleeping ... with 2 hookers.... Is 'sleeping' a euphemism for something? Do events that lead you to get a smelly finger involve replaying your own bad movie? woywoy, you need to sit down with your mate over several pints and really ask a lot of questions about what this girl is like in bed. You can take vicarious pleasure in how good it is now. And if he ends up marrying her, at a later date you can remind him of how good things used to be, when she's taking their baby's temperature every 40 minutes all night in the same bed. Gosh, I hope mogski doesn't read this... Link to post Share on other sites
slow 0 Posted February 22, 2004 Share Posted February 22, 2004 Quote: Time heals nothing. hmmm... Quote: Hate is good. hmmm... Link to post Share on other sites
damian 0 Posted February 22, 2004 Share Posted February 22, 2004 dont take me too seriously slow-san..... at least not that particular post. Link to post Share on other sites
stripper on coke 0 Posted February 22, 2004 Share Posted February 22, 2004 d=(^o^)=b , wanna hook up and go for a night out sometime ? ? ? ? ? Sounds kinda fun...... Link to post Share on other sites
yodel 0 Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Something similar happened to me. I decided to keep the friend, and don't regret it. Time also played a good part in the deal. Link to post Share on other sites
Plucky 0 Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Quote: Originally posted by d=(^o^)=b: Time heals nothing. However heavy drinking, drugs and a generally hedonistic and self destructive attitude should help you on your way. Oh, and don't forget to hate. Hate is good. Get drunk, be bitter, blame everyone, thank nobody. Shit, I spit my water up reading that Good stuff! Seriously though, time does heal. Same thing happened with me and a friend. He got the girl, I got left out. Now that girl is gone and we are still great friends. A bit different for you I know, but just give it some time and try not to dwell too hard on it. If you really feel the need to talk with him or her, do it! You'll regret it if you don't and just get pent up with frustration. This is when the drugs and hookers and booze comes in. Nobody wants that. Well, maybe some do. A hooker sounds mighty good right about now.... Link to post Share on other sites
I_HATE_CHEESE 0 Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Quote: Originally posted by woywoy: You have already got rejected by her but.....What to do? but.....no buts mate, you struck out,you cant stand on the plate and wait for another pitch, it is tough, however do you know how your mate has always felt about this girl?, maybe he digs her just as passionately if not more than you? His chance came up and he who hesitates..... It does suck for you but it wasnt your destiny, you fell off the wave, time to paddle back out and wait for another wave to come. Life is too short. Link to post Share on other sites
veronica 2 Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 Time definitely heals - especially if you let it. Speaking from some experience. Link to post Share on other sites
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