thursday 1 Posted November 3, 2010 Share Posted November 3, 2010 Can you just get the Top Tips up without a prior announcement? It'll be much appreciated. Thnaks for you co-operation. Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted November 3, 2010 Share Posted November 3, 2010 Nah, I'm always excited when it arrives. Had a good laugh there's some good ones this time. Maybe tomorrow. Or maybe later. Link to post Share on other sites
BagOfCrisps 24 Posted November 4, 2010 Share Posted November 4, 2010 Come on gg, get a grip. Get them posted! Link to post Share on other sites
Schneebored 0 Posted November 4, 2010 Share Posted November 4, 2010 coooomonyoubarsteward! Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted November 4, 2010 Share Posted November 4, 2010 You do realise of course that provoking me will not hurry it along Link to post Share on other sites
Schneebored 0 Posted November 4, 2010 Share Posted November 4, 2010 Originally Posted By: grungy-gonads You do realise of course that provoking me will not hurry it along Really?... you sure? Not even a tiny little bit? Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted November 5, 2010 Share Posted November 5, 2010 Because it is annoying, it will take me longer. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted November 5, 2010 Share Posted November 5, 2010 :whip: get a move on Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted November 5, 2010 Share Posted November 5, 2010 are we there yet? Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted November 5, 2010 Share Posted November 5, 2010 For ****'s sake GG, hurry up! Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted November 6, 2010 Share Posted November 6, 2010 I'll try to get them up this weekend. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted November 6, 2010 Share Posted November 6, 2010 come on Eileen Link to post Share on other sites
Schneebored 0 Posted November 6, 2010 Share Posted November 6, 2010 dont care now. Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted November 7, 2010 Share Posted November 7, 2010 Top tips - go look at twitter and search for viz top tips. Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted November 7, 2010 Share Posted November 7, 2010 DAVINA MCCALL. Disguise your lack of TV presenting ability by gurning excessively at any nearby camera. Nobody will notice a thing. Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted November 7, 2010 Share Posted November 7, 2010 WIG WEARERS. Don't waste money on new wigs. Simply turn your old ones round for the 'boy band' look Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted November 7, 2010 Share Posted November 7, 2010 PAUL DANIELS. Liven up your routine by actually sawing the 'lovely' Debbie McGee in half on stage Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted November 8, 2010 Share Posted November 8, 2010 Originally Posted By: Schneebored dont care now. Oh ok. Won't bother then! Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted November 8, 2010 Share Posted November 8, 2010 The day I "go look at Twitter" for anything will be.... well, actually I just won't. Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted November 8, 2010 Share Posted November 8, 2010 sorry GG - I just couldn't wait. Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted November 8, 2010 Share Posted November 8, 2010 Twitter. What a load of utter bollocks. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted November 9, 2010 Share Posted November 9, 2010 it's called Twatter Link to post Share on other sites
Schneebored 0 Posted November 9, 2010 Share Posted November 9, 2010 Originally Posted By: grungy-gonads Originally Posted By: Schneebored dont care now. Oh ok. Won't bother then! It appears that I have spoilt the fun for everyone? Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted November 9, 2010 Share Posted November 9, 2010 oh fook, now look what ya geordies have dun Quote: The nation's crudest and arguably funniest comic - thanks to the likes of Sid The Sexist, Billy the Fish and the Fat Slags - is celebrating its 30th birthday. Viz began life in the Newcastle-Upon-Tyne bedroom of 19-year-old Chris Donald in 1979, with help from his brother Simon and friend Jim Brownlow. Copies of the first 12-page issue went on sale in a local pub for 20p - or 30p to students. Within hours, the run of 150 hand-drawn and hand-stapled copies had sold out and a comedy institution was born. The new foul-mouthed rag spread by word of mouth and by 1984, everyone in Newcastle aged 14 to 21 had heard of it. It was so littered with toilet humour that when Donald finally showed the comic to his mother, he had to cover most of it in Tippex to save her blushes. "His parents were lovely, I'm sure they must have been shocked when their son became famous for this rather salacious publication," said Peter Brent, an old friend of the Donald brothers. "He obviously had a great talent even in those days," he went on. Roger Mellie reveals all to Sky News Online "If you went in Chris's bedroom, you couldn't see anything for the paper. It was everywhere, on the floor, the furniture, the bed, absolutely everywhere." Mr Brent, 62, told Sky News Online how he became immortalised as the character Peter Brent And His Bucket Of Cement in an early issue of the comic. "I've never lived it down to this day. Most embarrassing," he chuckled. "It was about this naughty schoolboy who got up to all kinds of nonsense with buckets of cement," he explained. Mr Brent said something many readers may be unaware of is the Viz team's involvement with charity over the years. "The amount of work they have done on behalf of various charities is incredible," he said. "Viz used to raise money to send underpriviledged kids on adventures. They always used to contribute lots of items to be auctioned and lots of artwork." The comic hit the mainstream when it was discovered by John Brown, then of Virgin Publishing, who grabbed onto its coat-tails, taking the comic with him when he set up his own publishing firm in 1985. Viz went on to become Britain's third most popular magazine in the early 90s, with sales peaking at over 1.2 million. As it reaches the ripe old age of 30, the adult comic has a brand reach of 620,000 people and a longstanding readership of nearly 400,000 with its current publisher Dennis Publishing. Viz team in the 80s: Chris Donald, Graham Dury, Simon Donald and Simon Thorp Viz cartoonists Simon Thorp, Graham Dury and Davey Jones reckon they have created nearly 10,000 characters over the past three decades including the likes of Roger Mellie, Sid The Sexist, Billy the Fish and the Fat Slags. Editor Hampton Doubleday paid tribute to the comic, saying: "Exactly 30 years ago to the day, I was honoured to be appointed to the post of Viz editor. "In those days, the world was a different place and the comic was a cheaply-printed, 12-page tatty rag full of poor quality jokes and badly-drawn cartoons. "Over the ensuing three decades, the changes in our lives have been phenomenal; we've seen the rise of the world-wide web, scientists have sent rockets to the edge of the known universe and we've witnessed the end of Apartheid and the fall of the Berlin Wall. "But perhaps the most fantastic change that has occurred is that Viz is now a cheaply-printed 52-page tatty rag full of poor quality jokes and badly-drawn cartoons. "I feel pride in the things that the magazine has achieved over the years. "The creation of iconic characters such as Roger Mellie, Johnny Fartpants and Peter Brent (& his Bucket of Cement), the Top Tips and Letters that have become as much a national institution as Broadmoor Hospital for the criminally insane. "Not to mention the Profanisaurus's popularisation of such arcane obscenities as 'Fitbin', 'Cleveland Steamer' and 'Boston Pancake'." Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted November 12, 2010 Share Posted November 12, 2010 My friend had never had a holiday abroad in here life as she was absolutely terrified of flying. However, last week I pointed out to her that it was actually the safest form of transport. What a fool she felt when she realised, and she immediately booked a two week break in Barbados. I could never remember which end of a battery was the positive and which was the negative, so I made up a little rhyme to remember: - Two ends a batter does have - One positive, the other ground - The latter is as flat as glass - Whilst on the first a bump is found Obviously it doesn't work for PP3's or those with the rabbit ear terminals, but I'm working on it. It really surprised me that the Japanese sided with the Nazis during the Second World War. They're usually so polite. Scientists claim that spiders silk is one of the strongest materials known to man. Well how come I've just punched a hole straight through one of their webs, and I'm not even that hard. Apparently, Angelina Jolie has had an intimate tattoo done on her thigh which is "just for Brad". I'm guessing that it's a big arrow with the words "This way to pissflaps" written underneath. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts