something on the lighter side..

[montoya 0]

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/07/08/international/asia/08weddings.html?pagewanted=all

 

Here Comes the Japanese Bride, Looking Very Western

 

By JAMES BROOKE

Published: July 8, 2005

TOKYO, July 1 - As a soprano sings "Ave Maria," a Japanese couple march down the center aisle of a hotel chapel, past white trumpet lilies, to the altar where an American "pastor" stands, gold cross gleaming on white robes.

 

Charles Pertwee for The New York Times

Victor Spiegel, 37, a Florida native, performing a mock wedding ceremony at the New Otani Hotel in Tokyo as potential customers look on.

"Before God and these witnesses, I pronounce you husband and wife," intones Damon Mackey, a California native who took a two-day course to perform weddings on weekends, supplementing his income as an English teacher and part-time actor.

 

In Japan, where a love affair with Western "white weddings" is leading to a collapse in Shinto ceremonies, a new figure is taking over the altar: the gaijin, or foreign, "pastor."

 

Only 1.4 percent of Japan's 127 million people are Christians, but Christian-style ceremonies now account for three-quarters of Japanese weddings. To meet market demand, bridal companies in recent years have largely dispensed with the niceties of providing a pastor with a seminary education, keeping the requirements simple: a man from an English-speaking country who will show up on time, remember his lines, not mix up names and perform the ceremony in 20 minutes.

 

From a small beginning a few years ago, the Western wedding "priest" has suddenly become an established part of modern Japan's cultural tableau. The lure of easy money has prompted hundreds of foreign men to respond to newspaper advertisements here, like the one that read: "North Americans, Europeans wanted to conduct wedding ceremonies."

 

"Now all the hotels have chapels with someone dressed up as a priest," said William J. Grimm, a Maryknoll priest who edits The Catholic Weekly of Japan.

 

In fact, the less overtly religious the pastor, the better. Hotel managers generally discourage proselytizing by authentic Christian pastors.

 

"The companies like the nonreligious guy who just follows the script," said Mike Clark, a Japanese language student who performed weddings before moving home to Canada last fall.

 

The boom in what some Japanese magazines call "foreign fake pastors" speaks volumes about modern Japan's attachment to appearances and its smorgasbord approach to religion. Japanese often choose Shintoism for childhood age ceremonies, Christianity for weddings and Buddhism for funerals.

 

"Of course, words are important, but in a ceremony it is more about the whole image," Masahiko Sakamoto, 25, said after watching Kenyon L. Nelson, a retired businessman from Missouri, perform a wedding at a hotel bridal fair. "And a foreigner fits better into a Western wedding than a Japanese person would."

 

Maki Oyama, his fiancée, said firmly that she wanted a white dress, a foreign pastor and a hotel chapel wedding. She added, "In soap operas you have more examples of white weddings than of Shinto ones."

 

The passion for Western-style weddings was first fueled in the 1980's by the televised weddings of Prince Charles and Lady Diana and of the Japanese pop star Momoe Yamaguchi. Since 1996, according to the Ministry of Economy, Trade and Industry, the number of Christian weddings has nearly doubled while the number of Shinto weddings has plunged by two-thirds.

 

Western weddings revolve around love and elevate the bride to a princess, Japanese say. In a tradition-bound Shinto wedding, where the bride is encased in a wig and a kimono, the ceremony seems to be more about the merger of two families.

 

Only civil unions are legally valid here and with Japan's economy treading water, about 70 percent of all couples go on to have an optional religious ceremony. Now, hotels are tearing out money-losing Shinto shrines and replacing them with the ersatz Christian chapels staffed with a foreign "priest."

 

"I am supposed to finish in 18 minutes," Victor Spiegel, a 37-year-old Florida native, said after walking a pair of models through a touching, if briskly paced, wedding ceremony for a bridal fair. Overhead, a movie camera had run on a ceiling track, filming a three-woman chorus singing "Ave Maria," the couple marching past red roses suspended in crystal columns, and white curtains opening to a hotel garden where a green neon cross glowed in the afternoon sun.

 

Mr. Spiegel, an English teacher who performs more than 100 weddings a year, said that sometimes "the hotel will do 15 in a day."

 

At a bridal fair here, couples insisted that the Christian "pastor" had to be a foreigner. Youichi Hirahara, a 27-year-old civil servant, said: "It would seem very unreal and fake if there was a Japanese person conducting the ceremony. Very shady actually."

 

Among foreigners, competition has depressed the pay for a wedding ceremony to $120, from $200 five years ago. In a society that revolves around business cards, the card of one part-time "pastor" reads: "Max von Schuler Kobayashi: Performer, Actor, MC, Wedding Minister."

 

While the prime motivator for the Western wedding ministers is cash, many take an extra pride in their work.

 

"My goal was to make at least one person cry at each ceremony," said Mr. Clark, the Canadian student. He said performing weddings was a great part-time job "but kind of kooky, kind of surreal."

 

"There was the whole factory aspect of it, the 20-minute turnarounds," he said. "All icing, no cake. Then, there I was, an atheist, reading and reciting these Japanese Christian scripts that I barely understood."

 

Reg Hackshaw, 42, a New Zealander who performs weddings, said he was "raised as a Catholic, but got fed up with the hypocrisy." Asked if spending his Sundays dressed as a priest and marrying non-Christians at a hotel "chapel" conflicted with his agnosticism, Mr. Hackshaw answered: "O.K., I am dressing up in a robe, but it's not a religious ceremony. It's a performance."

 

"The number of times someone has asked what church I belong to I can count on one hand," added Mr. Hackshaw, who teaches English and works as a disc jockey during the week.

 

Noting that he had conducted over 2,000 wedding ceremonies, Mr. Hackshaw said that Japanese brides demanded foreign ministers, saying: "They identify Christianity as something foreign. And, because it is foreign, they want a foreign pastor."

 

At the hotel lobby here, where Mr. Sakamoto and his fiancée were planning their wedding with a foreign pastor, a similar view was heard.

 

"You don't see a foreign person doing a Shinto wedding, do you?" he asked. "Now that would be strange."

[Thunderbird2 0]

Haha.

Can I be an athiest and do this?

[sakebomb 0]

I can honestly say I have done this job.

No one questioned my religious beliefs, I have been told my attitudes and ideals swing towards buddism (?). I am quite agnostic in my beliefs which is why I quit in the end, my beliefs and the hoax did my head in.

The couples didn't care I don't think they just wanted some blue eye gaijin to do the wedding as opposed to the Japanese priest, whom by the way were pretty cool even helpful knowing that I was a fraud. I felt a little sorry for these guys as the church is their life and study hard to fulfill their roles/beliefs.

PS. the money was good, but at the end of the day my beliefs won!

[kintaro 0]

I do this on some weekends. I've done probably around 3000 weddings. I do hold a license in the US to perform weddings and have performed weddings in the US. For me it's a lot of fun. I see all kinds of emotions, mistakes, happy people, nervous grooms, mothers crying....it's always interesting.

[sakebomb 0]

I would have to agree there Kintaro, the emotions and happiness were great rewards.

Also go tohere you are doing an honest job

[zebedee 1]

 Quote:

I do this on some weekends. I've done probably around 3000 weddings

Hmmmm... so how long have you been here? (And how old are you?!!)

[kintaro 0]

7 years. I'm 32.

[sanjo 2]

And you've done 3000 weddings?!

[kintaro 0]

Yes, for 6 years, about 500 per year (15,000 yen per wedding). It's a nice little part time gig wereas my gaijinnes plays to my advantage. Like I said, I enjoy doing it and have done for free on occasion.

[sunrise 0]

I've sung at many wedding ceremonies. All the companies I know will only use real pastors/priests. One company, which does the Tokyo Bay Sheraton which used to employ unqualified gaijin to do the pastor service. Some years back there was a major scandal when they found out these guys weren't 'real' so companies got paranoid and started to only get the real deal, or at least people who are legally licensed to do weddings even if they're not actual pastors or priests. One company brings pastors over from the States and the head guy (Japanese) is a pastor himself. They also have Japanese pastors in that company who do weddings, though I've never done one with any.

 

I had to giggle - I know Max von Schuler mentioned in the article. That guy is such a crazy character! heh heh, he really does ham it up at the weddings, however he does have a license to do weddings, which this article doesn't mention. I'm not sure what his actual qualifications are, but I know he spent a year doing some kind of minister's course studying for it. Of course Max is not really the minister type - he's a mad crazy drinker, hehehe - he told me he'd changed to a man of God, but I know too much about his past to believe it....! Haven't bumped into him for a while now. Last time I saw him he was about to start doing weddings for a company that does out of town work paying 40,000 yen a wedding.

 

Sounds like they're much more lenient about who they use out of town than Tokyo. But according to that article, even in Tokyo it sounds like some places are getting more lenient and Japanese couples don't care as much whether the priest is the real deal or not nowadays.

[Yuki's Passion 1]

愛は寛容であり、愛は情け深い、又、妬む事をし 394;い。愛は高ぶらない、誇らない、無作法をしない 。。。

 

笑！

 

[Yuki's Passion 1]

I think foreigners who do weddings can make just as much money as girls doing enjokosai if not more. I know places that do 20,000-30,000/wedding. Imagine if you did 3 on Sat and Sunday. Its enough to buy you new ski gear and pay for your winter...

[scouser 4]

Yeah it looks like I should quit my job and just do that part time.

[pjem 0]

It sure does if there is that much money in it. I'd very easily quit what I am doing now to do that and get considerably more than what I am now, I'll have to look into it.

[damian 0]

 Quote:

Originally posted by Kintaro:
I do this on some weekends. I've done probably around 3000 weddings.

"on some weekends".... so not every weekend? How long have you been in Japan? If you did 6 weddings a weekend for 10 years, you would have done 3120 weddings, as you say, about 3000. Sure your numbers are correct? If so then you have earned half a million dollars doing weddings.

Why anyone would want to imitate a traditional christian wedding I have no idea. I am a hardcore agnostic and non-traditionalist. Weddings followed by funerals top my list of non-traditional motivation: both are strange ceremonies to me, although a funeral has more benefit for the attendees than does a wedding. I went to a funeral once, they mentioned god more times than they mentioned the name of my dead mate. Way off topic.

I once happened across a shinto wedding in Nara during sakura season. I had no idea what was going on but I watched it and it was very very pretty.

[Ocean11 0]

The Christian marriage vows have the makings of a pretty good contract, if only people would take them seriously. You can make a decent life for yourselves (the so-called 'miracle of marriage') if you do.

 

Little cups of sake are all well and good, but they don't really constitute an agreement.

[NoFakie 45]

I got one of my mates who does the fake priest thing to marry me and my wife. We met through him, so it was a natural choice and I was always curious to see him in action. Since he doesn't have his own robes, I got him to wear a bright red bishop costume I found on the Internet. It was the kind of OTT thing you'd wear at Halloween or a "vicar and tarts" party.

 

Along with the getup, I got him to do the straight Japanese wedding parlour "production line" ceremony as a bit of a pisstake. Noone in my family is especially religious, so there was noone to offend. I don't know about anyone else, but I really enjoyed it.

 

My mate then got another fake priest to marry him, but that was more of a straight ceremony. As an alternative to a "religious" service, a mate back home had a humanist service with lots of original vows, which were all well thought-out and meaningful, but it dragged on a bit to be honest. At least the vanilla "production line" deal in Japan is nice and short. Weddings should be about celebration rather than ceremony.

 

As the article says, the general pattern in Japan is to have variousShinto ceremonies and a Buddhist funeral, so that shows you what the basic attitude is to religion. A lot of Shinto is simply "please God, protect my family" type stuff, so it's not especially deep. The rites at Buddhist funerals are esoteric and impenetrable, and basically do not mean anything to anyone. They sound very nice, but if you want to listen to something subtle and intoxicating, you could just stick on some top-quality deep techno, for example (I recommend Basic Channel!). Throwing some Christianity into the Japanese mix because "it looks nice" doesn't make the situation any worse. The problem is that some Westerners think religion should mean the same thing to Japanese as it does to them. In many senses, the Japanese model is better. You don't get much religion in politics, for example.

[Curt 1]

If there really is that much easy money involved, I'm off to investigate this weekend. I can do that.

[sanjo 2]

 Quote:

Weddings should be about celebration rather than ceremony

The one I went to seemed to very much the other way round - it was all about ceremony rather than celebration.

[sunrise 0]

Yeh, it's usually pretty serious business in those chapels....

[Yuki's Passion 1]

There are some really cute bridesmaids that are always lookin too...

[sakebomb 0]

I probably shouldn't mention this but Yama is right. One wedding I did comes to mind where the bridesmaid had rather large breasts, which is kinda rare here. To make it worse they resembled cones, like witches hats. I couldn't concentrate and kept looking, she was a hottie too!

[kintaro 0]

DB, on some weekends and on taiyan (lucky days) or holidays and sometimes as many as 12 in a day. My numbers are correct.

[Ocean11 0]

There ought to be a droit du seigneur for foreign vicars.

 

"And now, Toru, if you'll excuse us... God bless you, son."

[fjef 0]

My father is a judge in Canada - he has married most of my friends. He can't charge money but he has a few rules - the couple must write their own original script and the marriage must be creative. He has performed the ceremonies on skiis, on sailboats, on golf courses (my sister) in a canoe (my brother) and the success rate of the marriages he has performed are much higher than the church wedding averages...