HelperElfMissy 42 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Feeling happy and sad today... My first born is at his LAST day of school. A Valedictory Breakfast and Assembly this morning, then home until this evening when we (parents and child) all go to school for the Valedictory Address/Service and Dinner. Then it is done - just 6 exams for 5 subjects over the next 3 weeks and he is a free man. His exams are bookended by Japanese. First exam is Japanese Oral Examination which he is SO nervous about this thursday - then chem, 2 maths and English - finished off after a whole weeks break by the Japanese written exam which he is very confident about. I feel thrilled that we don't have to pay his school fee's next year Thrilled that he is grown Excited for him But kinda sad that we have reached the end of the road for our 'role' as parents I know we will still be parents and have a role, but now it is over to him to decide - Uni, work, life choices. My baby is growing/grown up. Link to post Share on other sites
scouser 4 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Congrats Mamabear. More time for you now? Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 you have a long way to go. Uni is an expereince not to be missed. You can do his laundry at weekends. Link to post Share on other sites
muikabochi 208 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 And, that laundry may well smell bad. But congrats anyway! Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted October 28, 2008 Author Share Posted October 28, 2008 Smells bad already!! Link to post Share on other sites
2pints-mate 0 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 It will smell worse. My feet conspired against me 1st year at uni. Link to post Share on other sites
Amos in Utsunomia 0 Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Any big plans for when they are all away at college/working for Mama and Papabear. Must have been a while since you could do that properly! Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted October 29, 2008 Author Share Posted October 29, 2008 Amos, Nice of you tho think about that for us! Papa and I did have a long period of time (having 4 of the blighters) where we did not do things for US...but we rectified that. In fact, #1 son (who graduated last night -awwww!) has 3 weeks of exams and the day he completes his last one Papa and I are off to spend 4 nights in HK in a rather nice hotel by OURSELVES. My parents are quite young and capable - they will move in for the few days. #1 son is old enough to look after himself, #2 son will be on 'Venture' - school trek torture of 3 weeks duration - bit like boot camp! So that leaves the 11yrd old and 9 yr old for Mum to manage. We have a lot of school Christmas concert committments for the little ones when we get back - so it is a quick trip - squeezed between our duties to our kids. We will however be very thankful that the school fee's will be dropped by a quarter for next year ....and from what I hear from other parents with older children the Uni fee's are HALF what we were paying for High School. More money for Papa and I to do MORE adult trips Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 If anything, once you don't depend on your parents, you find out that you need them more than ever. I didnt resent my parents when I was growing up, but that sense of control ie their house, their rooms, did hinder our relationship. Now that has gone - I find myself talking to them more as close friends and going out for beers with my dad whenever I go back. Link to post Share on other sites
Hokkaidough 4 Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 I wish I could do that with my dad. We don't not get on but it's not quite that kind of relationship though. Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted October 29, 2008 Author Share Posted October 29, 2008 Between the ages of 13 and 21 I think my mother hated me! LOL She certainly acted like it....and even the people around me felt it. It was really about her not being able to accept me becoming my own person instead of HER daughter. But I had my first child fairly young - I was 22 (and had been married for 2 years) - and I reached out to her then. I told her that I needed her, and I needed her advice. All was forgiven and we are now best friends. I CHOOSE to call my Mum and catch up for lunch. In fact I called her and asked if she wanted to come shopping with me for shoes for the #1 sons graduation. If my mother and I can go from loggerheads to best mates - anyone can given the inclination and effort from both sides. Our relationship with #1 son has its tough moments - he is not the most thoughtful or considerate cookie...however we do have great times as well. I am confident that he will be joining his Dad and I carving up snowy mountains all over the world for many years to come.. (Especially if we are paying! ) Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Originally Posted By: Mamabear Between the ages of 13 and 21 I think my mother hated me! Which mother doesn't hate their TEENAGER! Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Originally Posted By: Hokkaidough I wish I could do that with my dad. We don't not get on but it's not quite that kind of relationship though. When it first happened, we were both like that. Think the years of troubles and problems had built up and it did take time - we can both be stubborn and neither of us likes to admit we're wrong or done something stupid. However, it started off with small concessions, me asking him if he wanted a beer out, him talking about some of my interests, us having a drinking session, birth of my nephew, etc. Then one day, coming down to breakfast just chatting over tea/coffee - something he doesn't understand - just got us talking. And now, as MB said, we CHOOSE when to talk, not forced to over dinner. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Great to get away from home at last and have your own place, be it a dorm room. What freedom it was. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 I get on great with my parents and would often go up the local for a pint with the old man. Its one of the things I miss actually is the crack with the old man. I get on fine with my mum as well and now that I'm away, when I phone she tells me literally EVERYTHING that is going on with various friends and family. I know more about whats going on at home when I'm away, than I do when I'm actually at home!! Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted October 30, 2008 Author Share Posted October 30, 2008 UPDATE: One exam down and five to go. Today he completed the Japanese Oral Examination. There were only 3 boys from his school sitting the exam. There were four but one pulled out due to inability to get a resonable mark overall due to poor year performance - he decided to spend his study time on the other subjects. That left three. One Japanese boy who has done his entire schooling here in Perth, but speaks Japanese at home and spends all the holidays in Japan...guess he should do OK...and one other boy who usually does very well. The other boy came out of the exam concerned that he did not even pass!!! My son came out jubilent. He was MOST concerned about this exam beforehand, but felt confident and fully conversant - there was nothing that stumped him at all. I was THRILLED for him that he got such a positive start to his examinations. Link to post Share on other sites
2pints-mate 0 Posted October 31, 2008 Share Posted October 31, 2008 Well done! Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted November 1, 2008 Author Share Posted November 1, 2008 Thanks 2pints, And I think we shall celebrate with a couple a pints tonight coz he just got his Skippers Ticket today as well (along with Papabear and the 2nd born)...so they are all licenced to drive the wake boat! It is fast paced and exciting at our place at the moment! Link to post Share on other sites
brit-gob 9 Posted November 1, 2008 Share Posted November 1, 2008 Good stuff. So there are good things about sprogs it seems May they be successful ones! Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted November 2, 2008 Share Posted November 2, 2008 Children are ace. See for yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
JA2340 16 Posted November 3, 2008 Share Posted November 3, 2008 Hmmm ... somewhat biased opinion there, methinks! My firstborn is "somewhere" in the USA, and has not been in contact with the family for just over 18months. My baby daughter has just recently re-established contact with me (after about 15 years imposed exile - imposed by her mother!) via facebook, and is working as a teacher in the UK. Her elder sister is in Germany (soon to be in Spain) with Cirque de Soleil, Europe in props. The diffe=rence isthat the girls have made an effort to reconnect, the son couldn;t give a stuff - in his own world, methinks! Link to post Share on other sites
BillTheBinMan 0 Posted November 3, 2008 Share Posted November 3, 2008 I can't imagine "cutting off" from family, though sure people have their reasons whatever. My family are all quite close. Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted November 3, 2008 Author Share Posted November 3, 2008 My husbands parents cut off from thier family....but there are mental health issues (among other things) there. I think in families where there is divorce and the custodial parent plays nasty games there can be loss of contact through no fault of the child or extranged parent - that is sad. But the vast majority of these family breakdowns are due to serious problems either in the relationship or the mental health of one of the two parties. I am fortunate to have a great family (albiet flawed in thier own way). And my husband has seen the relationships we have and decided to live his life by that model of ongoing relationship. But it doesn't happen by accident. Parents have to work at it - and as JA says...even then it is no guarentee. BUT IT IS WORTH THE RISK Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted November 7, 2008 Author Share Posted November 7, 2008 Japanese Oral Exam - done, thrilled with performance. Calculus Exam - done, feels OK - hard exam, but feels was a solid effort. English Exam - done, not his area, but felt it was easier than any English exam ever done before... so happy with it. Applic Maths - Monday Chemistry - Wednesday Japanese Written - following week Thursday. So far so good... Link to post Share on other sites
muikabochi 208 Posted November 8, 2008 Share Posted November 8, 2008 Curious time (for me) to be having exams! Glad they are going well though. Link to post Share on other sites
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