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Have you heard that 2 of the rauchiest women on the planet, Ivana Humpalot and Felicity Shagwell, are going to be riding down a hollowed out volcano in Niigata in January?

 

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Austin: Those are skin tight. How do you get into those pants baby?

 

Felicity Shagwell: You can start by buying me a drink.

 

Austin: And who are you, baby?

Ivana: Ivana... Ivana Humpalot.

Austin: Excuse me?

Ivana: Ivana Humpalot.

Austin: Well, I wanna gold plated toilet, but that's just not in the cards, is it?

 

Ivana: Do you know how we keep warm in Russia?

Austin: I can guess, baby.

Ivana: We play chess.

Austin: I guessed wrong.

 

 

Don't lose it like this guy:

 

Dr. Evil: From the moment I heard Frau say I had a clone, I knew that I'd be safe cuz I'd never be alone. An evil doctor shouldn't speak aloud about his feelings, my hurt and my pain don't make me too appealing. I'd hoped Scott would look up to me, run the business of the family, head an evil empire just like his dear old dad, give him my love and the things I never had. Scott would think I was a cool guy, return the love I have, make me want to cry, be evil, but have my feelings too, change my life with Oprah and Maya Angelou. But Scott rejected me, c'est la vie, life is cruel, treats you unfairly, even so, a God there must be, Mini Me, you complete me.

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If there's a few parties, perhaps she could come a few times.

 

Oo-er. Sorry, that kind of talk is dirty.

 

Anyway, if this is at the "right time", we might even be able to turn up! Still not sure exactly when that will be, firming up soon.

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