yamayamayama 2 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 Anyone else got fairly elderly parents? I see mine once a year or thereabouts and they are now both in their 70's. They are both doing fairly well but the last few years they have got noticeably older and not seeing them all the time probably makes it more marked. It's sad to see people get older to the point where they can't move around like they are used to and aches and pains and things and obviously it won't be getting better. Until recently I've never really given the prospect of them getting old and even not being here that much thought, but the first part is now reality and it is fairly hard to deal with. Especially when the family is so close (even though I live so far away physically). Link to post Share on other sites
soubriquet 0 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 Yes. My father died about 10 years ago, aged 88. Mother is now over 90, and completely lost her memory. I haven't spoken to her for 5 years or more. Pointless, she doesn't know who I am. Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 That is awfully sad. I remember my husbands Nanna with great fondness, she had the opposite problem soubs, sharp as a tack but all the supporting apparatus failed her. She was losing her vision, was very very deaf, and was physically incapacitated. It was very hard for her to feel so trapped inside an ageing and decrepid body, when she had the mind of a sprite. My Dad had a significant birthday this past weekend and I really noticed the signs of aging in my Aunts, uncles, and other people from my childhood! Time marches on whether we are ready for it or not. Link to post Share on other sites
indosnm 0 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I know what you mean mate. I notice my parents getting older though my dad will only turn 60 in 2 weeks and my mum is 54 this year. My grandfather passed away last week, was hoping I'd get to spend some time with him when I got home. Luckily, I saw him at Xmas. Link to post Share on other sites
NoFakie 45 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 This is also something to thing about if you want kids in the future. We had our first after I thought my folks had started looking old. The later you leave it, the less time your kids will get with their grandparents and the harder it'll be for your folks to travel to see them. Link to post Share on other sites
soubriquet 0 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 That's a bit of an oddity (one of many?) in my family. I started the family at 40. My father was 45 when I was born and his father 45 too. That takes us back to about 1872. Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 Originally Posted By: Indo I know what you mean mate. I notice my parents getting older though my dad will only turn 60 in 2 weeks and my mum is 54 this year. My grandfather passed away last week, was hoping I'd get to spend some time with him when I got home. Luckily, I saw him at Xmas. Hey Indo - MY Dad was 60 this week!!! LOL Mum is only 10 months younger than him though. I still have one grandparent - Mum's Mum - despite losing a lung to cancer 8 years ago, and having a benign tumor behind her eyes thanks to the beatings she took from her war altered husband, she is still kicking strong at 84 (her 21st birthday was Feb 29th this year). But I also had a great grandmother (Dad's Mum's Mum) make it to 99 - she was telling everyone that would listen for YEARS that she had had enough - she had lost her parents, her children and one of her grandchildren and she just wanted to fall asleep and not wake up, I suppose you must get tired after 99 years! Link to post Share on other sites
scouser 4 Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I know what you mean. Mine are generally fine, but I do see subtle changes every time I'm home which is usually each summer. Unavoidable of course, just got to deal. Link to post Share on other sites
2pints-mate 0 Posted March 18, 2008 Share Posted March 18, 2008 Yes yes I know what you are saying. Unfortunately and very obviously it is inevitable. I know my father keeps on saying that he hopes when he goes it will be sudden after his tea or in his sleep. A shock to people of course, but better than seeing a long drawn out illness cripple someone. My friends dad has been very ill for 5 years now and it will be relief for everyone involved when he passes on. Link to post Share on other sites
bobby12 0 Posted March 18, 2008 Share Posted March 18, 2008 That's another tricky area. I guess one good thing about when we were cavemen was that you wouldn't have those long drawn out deaths. Link to post Share on other sites
I'm Sexy 0 Posted March 23, 2008 Share Posted March 23, 2008 My parents are still quite young I think and fine but I cannot imagine when they are ill or life without them. My friend is 25 and both her parents died in last two years, both were in early 50s. She cannot recover from it even now I feel. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted March 23, 2008 Share Posted March 23, 2008 My parents are still young as well, but my dad had a heart attack at the end of last year and it really threw me off. He is a very fit guy, had just turned 50 and he had that. It wasn't a particualrly nice Xmas-New year period for me. Thankfully he survived it and is back to his usual self Link to post Share on other sites
JA2340 16 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Jeeze, Indo, Your dad and I are much the same vintage - he is a looong way from old yet! (my b'day is April 23, 1948). My dad is starting to look old, and to feel it - which is more the point - and he is just 83 and Mum is 82. Link to post Share on other sites
Go Native 70 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Dad died years ago of cancer and haven't seen mum in a couple of years now. Hopefully she won't hang on too much longer as I'm wanting some of the inheritance before she spends it all!! Link to post Share on other sites
lin 0 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 That's nice. My parents are both fine as of now. Both in their 60s. Link to post Share on other sites
2pints-mate 0 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Those are big numbers Mamabear. One of my grandmothers made it to 96 and she was remarkably fine until the last week (she had a stroke). Link to post Share on other sites
Kingofmyrrh 0 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Originally Posted By: Go Native Dad died years ago of cancer and haven't seen mum in a couple of years now. Hopefully she won't hang on too much longer as I'm wanting some of the inheritance before she spends it all!! I hope that's a joke... Link to post Share on other sites
Yuki's Passion 1 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 I havent seen my parents in 3 years. Looking forward to going home this summer. I know my dad's health if waining as is my grandma's but my mom is still very healthy thank goodness. Wonder what everybody will look like after 3 years? Link to post Share on other sites
wendy-cake 0 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Get her to send a pic My parents are both fine, not yet in their 60s Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted March 25, 2008 Share Posted March 25, 2008 My dad has had a few things going on the last few years and while generally he seems fine I can see a definite slow down. It is very sad to see happening but you know what can you do, just got to get on with it. It's not as if I see them that often, but I can't imagine life without them 'being there'. Link to post Share on other sites
rach 1 Posted March 26, 2008 Share Posted March 26, 2008 Last summer when I was back in England one of my friends mum died suddenly. She was distraught. And very worried about how dad would get on without mum. It often seems to be the case though doesn't it - mums actually doing better on their own than dads. Well, it sure seems that way with the people I know. Link to post Share on other sites
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