Ocean11 0 Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 Any girls hoping to be impregnated with valuable Ocean11 seed have until Tuesday afternoon. Availability will fall off sharply thereafter. Girls wishing to take advantage of this final opportunity should get themselves to Matsuyama and join the queue. (Important note: Offspring are likely to be argumentative. No responsibility will be taken for damages incurred by mothers.) Link to post Share on other sites
miteyak 0 Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 It's good to hear you're going the whole hog; Re: environmental responsibilities... a veritable beacon for us all. (although dishing it out beforehand might negate the benefits of tying the knot) Link to post Share on other sites
soubriquet 0 Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 I hope you don't have too much planned for the rest of the week. My little procedure was accompanied by an "oops", then a short time later by a comment about rather a lot of blood. It took about four days for the scrotum to start deflating from the size of an orange. Then there was this other bloke at work. He went bush, then got an infection. They had to fly him back from Laverton to Perth in an air ambulance. I heard it was very painful. Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted October 14, 2005 Author Share Posted October 14, 2005 Thanks soubriquet. I expect my scrotum to be the size of an orange anyway by the time I've done with the queue outside. I'm confident that the place I chose will be OK. The nurse who took my blood for tests managed it without me even feeling a pin prick, so somebody there at least has skills. Link to post Share on other sites
cheeseman 1 Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 At first I thought that Mrs Ocean was just going to be away until Tuesday Anyway, I recommend a good chunk of cheese to accompany you on the journey post-cutting. Not sure which cheese to recommend - what are your tastes? Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted October 14, 2005 Author Share Posted October 14, 2005 I was thinking one of those balls-shaped cheeses you recommended earlier might be appropriate. A softer cheese might come in handy for stemming unwelcome blood flows. Link to post Share on other sites
bettyx 0 Posted October 15, 2005 Share Posted October 15, 2005 my elder bro had it done. our other bro asked how he felt after the surgery, he said, 'well, i wasn't going to run home, that's for sure'. other than that, no complaints from him nor his wife. o-daijini Link to post Share on other sites
slow 0 Posted October 15, 2005 Share Posted October 15, 2005 TMI! TMI! Too much information, Ocean!!! Link to post Share on other sites
sava 0 Posted October 15, 2005 Share Posted October 15, 2005 and they need an emoticon for throwing up Link to post Share on other sites
Hokkaidough 4 Posted October 17, 2005 Share Posted October 17, 2005 @Ocean11. How has the take up been on your offer? You busy today and tomorrow morning then? Any special plans? Link to post Share on other sites
Yuki's Passion 1 Posted October 17, 2005 Share Posted October 17, 2005 How about a bucket of ice for your balls? Maybe you could chill a nice bottle of wine in it at the same time? Snip, snip, ooooops! Words you dont want the Doc to say Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted October 17, 2005 Author Share Posted October 17, 2005 Not much response yet. They'll regret it. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Haversham 0 Posted October 17, 2005 Share Posted October 17, 2005 Oh come on, you have to at least post a profile and some pictures. Otherwise how will we know what to regret? Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted October 17, 2005 Author Share Posted October 17, 2005 There you go. Miss Haversham, perhaps I should have said that candidates will be screened carefully for their genetic fitness and capacity for motherly patience. I won't be casting my pearls before any swine. So please have your profile ready. Link to post Share on other sites
sakebomb 0 Posted October 17, 2005 Share Posted October 17, 2005 Ocean, Could you freeze some for me for future use? Do you offer "on-farm semen" collection, semen evaluation, semen shipping and semen freezing. Quote: We have experience in collecting and freezing semen from high-profile SJ Forum members from around the world, as well as young stallions prior to the beginning of their careers. Link to post Share on other sites
NoFakie 45 Posted October 17, 2005 Share Posted October 17, 2005 Quote: Originally posted by Yamakashi: Snip, snip, ooooops! Words you dont want the Doc to say Yes, you could be in for a "eunuch" experience. Link to post Share on other sites
soubriquet 0 Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 Oh dear oh dear, Mr Wiggles. You don't have to believe this, but the quack's name was Doctor Snowball. He took great pleasure in holding each section of vas for my inspection as he took it. What path in life leads to be a vasectomist? Good luck tomorrow Ocean11. When my scrotum deflated, I was left with a green and purple bruise that went from my knees to my navel Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted October 18, 2005 Author Share Posted October 18, 2005 Thank you again, dear soubriquet. Surely pulling your vas up to where you could see it would tend to encourage swelling later? (In my case the doc would have to pull it up very high indeed so I could see it over the great coiled mound of Cumberland sausage.) I think you could have chosen your physician with more care ( - like me, by phoning them all and choosing the cheapest one.) Link to post Share on other sites
BagOfCrisps 24 Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 Any nerves Ocean?? Hope it's a good day! Link to post Share on other sites
soubriquet 0 Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 I'm sure he would have like to have pulled up the cut vas for my inspection, if it would have given me a good tug. As it was, he just showed me the excised 1cm. I'm enjoying this more than you. Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted October 18, 2005 Author Share Posted October 18, 2005 > Any nerves Ocean?? Um, well, yes, if you must know, a little. Uncle soubriquet isn't helping matters with all his jolly Schadenfreude. I shall be glad when it's over. Link to post Share on other sites
BagOfCrisps 24 Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 Well good luck. Can't imagine having it done myself... Link to post Share on other sites
2pints-mate 0 Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 How much does this kind of thing cost? I have absolutely no idea. Hope it goes well. Just don't get turned on when they take your keks off and you see the nurse. Be sure to wash well also. Link to post Share on other sites
damian 0 Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 I think I will wait for the male pill and in the meantime trust conventional measures. Good luck mate. I am saddened to know that your line will end at young H11. No more 11's Link to post Share on other sites
Dean 0 Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 Did anyone buy him a donught ring to sit on for a day or 2?? Link to post Share on other sites
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