@tokyo 14 Posted September 20, 2009 Share Posted September 20, 2009 Here's some good ones from the uk, we need some j-specific ones: Quote: The TV licence, like death and taxes, seems for most of us an inescapable burden. But there are those who try to dodge the £142.50-a-year fee – and come up with flagrant excuses when caught. One told an official: ‘My dog watches it while I’m at work to keep him company – not me.’ Another, caught red-handed, said: ‘The subtitles on my TV are set to French so I’m not paying a UK tax for something I can’t read.’ A list of the worst excuses has been compiled by TV Licensing, whose officials have caught more than 280,000 people this year, helped by new hand-held devices that beep if an operating TV is within 29ft – a huge advance on the detector vans with their unwieldy antennas. One viewer, claiming financial hardship, said: ‘My wife has her hair done twice a week, so we find it difficult to pay.’ Another also blamed monetary woes: ‘I haven’t renewed my licence because my wife flushed it down the toilet, along with my wallet.’ Other excuses ranged from the brazen ‘My husband has just spent £3,000 on this massive flatscreen digital TV so we can’t possibly afford a licence’ to the bizarre ‘I haven’t got a licence – I suffer from vertigo’, to the plain barmy: ‘If I switch the television on I’ll wake the Hallowe’en spirits in my cupboard.’ Animals featured in many tall tales. One evader said: ‘I have not been making payments because a baby magpie flew in to my house and I have had to stay in to feed it.’ Then there was the convoluted but nonetheless flawed reason: ‘I couldn’t make my last payment as my baby was sick on my shoulder and I didn’t want to go to the shop smelling of sick because the guy I fancy works there.’ TV Licensing spokesman Jon Shaw said: ‘No matter how creative these excuses, people are breaking the law and risk prosecution and a fine of up to £1,000. We recognise some people may be struggling to pay and in this case we urge them to contact us so we can help them. ‘One favourite excuse was the man who said he forgot to pay as his girlfriend had hit him over the head with a hammer. Others include the viewer who said he had an Asbo so couldn’t go into the village to pay, and one who said, “I can’t afford it. I have to pay my subscription for cable TV.â€â€™ Several thousand rebels have refused to pay fees since 2002 in protest at what they see as BBC political bias. And journalist Charles Moore threatened to rebel if Jonathan Ross remained on the BBC’s payroll after leaving obscene messages for actor Andrew Sachs. Link to post Share on other sites
Wizz 11 Posted September 20, 2009 Share Posted September 20, 2009 If they get past the 'answer the door or not' filter, try... nihongo wakaranai. Not that I would do such a terrible thing of course. Link to post Share on other sites
NutteyCubey 0 Posted September 20, 2009 Share Posted September 20, 2009 "I use it just for videogames" "TV programs are crap" Link to post Share on other sites
Jynxx 4 Posted September 20, 2009 Share Posted September 20, 2009 TV licence , what a joke! You need to pay tax to watch advertising ? Tax to make you an idiot, thank you very much . Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Um jynxx - the BBC doesn't have adverts. Link to post Share on other sites
Jynxx 4 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Oh... but I bet they advertise BBC. Themselves. That can go to the trivial irritations thread. TV channels that advertise themselves Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 yeah they do Jynxx, when I was home I noticed more and more BBC "advertising on the channel. Paying a licence bugs me sooooo much!! Cheeky buggers, I just spent x amount buying t then some smug bar steward says I have to pay to watch it!! eh?? WTF!!! The NHK guy, hasn't come to mines as yet, but if he does then he will have the door closed politely on him Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Originally Posted By: Jynxx but I bet they advertise BBC. Themselves. That can go to the trivial irritations thread. TV channels that advertise themselves I cannot think of one tv channel that does not "advertise itself" in some form. Even the ones you pay for on satellite tv. Can you? Link to post Share on other sites
HelperElfMissy 42 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 PayTV here has gone from "Ad free" as its biggest selling point to having Ads for anything and everything on every channel - bizarre. Link to post Share on other sites
RobBright 35 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Originally Posted By: Tubby Beaver yeah they do Jynxx, when I was home I noticed more and more BBC "advertising on the channel. Paying a licence bugs me sooooo much!! Cheeky buggers, I just spent x amount buying t then some smug bar steward says I have to pay to watch it!! eh?? WTF!!! The NHK guy, hasn't come to mines as yet, but if he does then he will have the door closed politely on him You actually open the door to him?! Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 I don't have a peep hole!! Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 remnents of a time gone by. Like polio, ricketts, smallpox, national service, empire. What a ridiculous thing to have. And people still don't rise up on masse against this tax? Link to post Share on other sites
Mantas 3 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 I find the the whole TV license thing a bit strange. Do you need to pass a test to obtain this license? Can you have more than 3 standard drinks in an hour and still watch it? Link to post Share on other sites
Go Native 70 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 I can see there needs to be a tax if you have a public free to air station that can't get revenue from advertising. In Aus though it's not a seperate tax where you have some choice in the matter. It's just taken from the general revenue taken from income taxes I think. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Yes, same here. Gov channel paid for through the big pot. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 And they turn out just as bad shit as the other channels. Link to post Share on other sites
Jynxx 4 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 NHK (japan) has merits cos it covers Rugby and sports and education. Education has one channel of it's own. I wonder if they market a TV without some channels (disable function) people will buy it? I want one that turns off, or mutes automatically when the AD is on. Hey, people. German TV really sucks big time. ADs are more louder, they put it at really bad timing, and guess what? they rewind and playback a minute of what they have already shown before the AD. Link to post Share on other sites
Mantas 3 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 Originally Posted By: Jynxx Hey, people. German TV really sucks big time. ADs are more louder, they put it at really bad timing, and guess what? they rewind and playback a minute of what they have already shown before the AD. I find it hard to believe that there is a place with worse TV than OZ. Link to post Share on other sites
Jynxx 4 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 Mantas, For some reasons I used to think Germany is a high tech, highly civilized, efficient, productive society. How wrong was I. This place is worst case scenario how Oz might end up. There is conspiracy here for sure. The ADs are unimaginative, uncreative, stereo-typical, The jokes they make are really bad to point I feel so good I actually do have a sense of humour. I miss SBS. Germans can't speak english as much as Japanese can't. They must have a huge voice-over union or something. I wish they shut up, put the original language and subtitle it. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 Originally Posted By: Mantas Originally Posted By: Jynxx Hey, people. German TV really sucks big time. ADs are more louder, they put it at really bad timing, and guess what? they rewind and playback a minute of what they have already shown before the AD. I find it hard to believe that there is a place with worse TV than OZ. agree! I was confused watching TV there, ads would come on every 5 mins and there would be no Programme titles to say the programme was taking a break or returning after the ad, if you looked away the bloody ad would be on without me even realising!! That at least is a bonus about BBC, but since BBC is utter pish it bugs me that we HAVE to pay for it......why can't we just not get it?? (when I live at home) Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 we should all be channel surfing like the obese amercian couch potatoes. Click, ... click,.... click,...... click,..... Link to post Share on other sites
Jynxx 4 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 I like discovery channels, National Geographics, Animal Planet ... click, click, click. snowboarding on Euro Sports 2 Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 trouble is with satellite, they repeat after 16 hours or something, so you get the same Nat Geo every other day. Link to post Share on other sites
Go Native 70 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 We actually don't watch TV at all at home. We hire, buy and download movies and TV series and that's it. Have thought about Sat TV but not convinced. Link to post Share on other sites
thursday 1 Posted September 22, 2009 Share Posted September 22, 2009 I've got cable, sat, normal shite TV, normal HD shite TV, and it's still shite overall. Link to post Share on other sites
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