pie-eater 207 Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 Just look at that gut. And he's proud of it too. Link to post Share on other sites
ShinyDiscoBall 2 Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 Well, you know I'm glad it's not Ancelloti or all those other dudes that have been here before. At least it's a breath of fresh air. Never know might turn out to be a brilliant move. Link to post Share on other sites
scouser 4 Posted June 23, 2011 Author Share Posted June 23, 2011 Quote: That bloke's rumoured to be a former Sunderland fan so there may bigger issues than his weight. Loyalty hey? Great big NUFC on his front! Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted June 24, 2011 Share Posted June 24, 2011 THOUSANDS of tattooed Chelsea supporters have locked themselves in their room listening to Justin Bieber after the appointment of André Villas-Boas as manager. The 34 year-old greeted fans at the gates of Stamford Bridge that were adorned with cards, poems and teddy bears from the club's legion of adorable, potbellied racists. Several police officers were injured in the resultant crush as the screaming throng surged forward to try and touch Boas' face. Corpulent taxi driver Wayne Hayes said: "AVB will give the club a fresh direction and some youthful enthusiasm as well as dreamy, tousled hair and eyes you could just drown in. "Roy Hobbs reckons he went on holiday to Portugal last year and met André at a nightclub and they did shots together but he's such a lying bitch and everybody knows his family are povvos that can't afford to go abroad." Boasmania also hit the club's merchandise shop, where hastily-manufactured posters featuring a shirtless Boas were snapped up at £50 a time and old Ancelotti stock was vandalised. Shop manager Charlie Reeves said: "It hasn't been this mad since Mourinho arrived and we had two hundred blokes camped outside the doors for a week waiting for our range of Jose pencil cases to come out. "It's been a nightmare locking up this evening - I don't know if you've ever had to roll three overweight builders who’ve fainted out onto the pavement but it's no picnic." The Portugese manager has thanked the fans - who have now dubbed themselves 'The Chelsea Boas Hunters' in his honour - and said that he will love them forever, or at least until Abramovich gets bored and feeds him to his killer whale. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted June 25, 2011 Share Posted June 25, 2011 one of the most bizarre things said by a football club: Quote: The Hearts Board of Directors has issued the following statement in relation to outside influences on players and the club. "What's happening with the club today is not a new thing. For almost 7 years we have been fighting to shield the club from crooks, criminals and thieves. Many of the top players at the club have felt the bitter results of the swindles that have been carried out with them on their own skin. Skacel and Webster have returned to the club after realising where these 'football patriots' have led them. "Over a short space of time 4 players at our club have been on the wrong end of the law. We note that 3 of them are represented by the same agent - Gary Mackay - who has been so vicious in his attacks against Mr Romanov. "Taking into account the facts that have been omitted by the media it can be presumed that each of these cases is not a coincidence, but the result of targeted actions of a mafia that wants to manipulate the club and the results. "Every year Hearts fights to be in the top 3, but even last season in the last 12 games of the season it was almost like someone replaced the team with a different one. Whose fault is that? Players? Manager's? Or it is mafia. "Stealing players, bad games, problems with the law - all of that on top of record SFA fines. Problems are just shifted to another level. "Mafia are dragging kids into the crime, in order to blackmail and profit on them. It is not possible to separate these people from pedophiles, and you don't need to do that. Each year we are forced to fight against these maniacs harder and harder. We are standing in their way not letting them manipulate the game of football in the way they want. As such they undermine us in every possible way they can. "The task of the club is to tear these kids out of hands of criminals." Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 WTF?! Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 exactly.....this was an actual press release from the Hearts Board of Directors! Romanov (the Hearts owner) is off his trolley! Its in the wake of a Hearts player, Craig Thomson, being found guilty of lewd and libidinous practices with underage girls. He groomed a 14yr old and a 12 yr old online, getting them to post pics of their naked bodies and then tried to meet the 14yr old for sex. He was tried and found guilty last week.....then Hearts release this! Link to post Share on other sites
soubriquet 0 Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 Is Hearts your team TB? Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 No, my team is Dundee United. Romanov, who is in charge at Hearts, is a mentalist. I fear for the future of the club TBH Link to post Share on other sites
soubriquet 0 Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 Is he related to the Czar? Lol. My lot are Norwich. Good to see them up this year. I wonder that will go. Head to head with pie-eater for the opener I see. Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 Pies vs Mustard! Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 Originally Posted By: soubriquet Is he related to the Czar? Lol. My lot are Norwich. Good to see them up this year. I wonder that will go. Head to head with pie-eater for the opener I see. The one that got away!! He's minted like the Czar, although I think he's actually Latvian or Lithuanian, he made his money in the murky days after the fall of the Soviets......mafia-related Good to see Norwich back in the top league, I remember getting to watch their away leg game against Inter Milan in Geography Class. Lambert has done really well since moving there, think you boys were in the relegation spots when he took his Colchester team and whupped you 4 or 5 nil. Then a week later he jumped ship to Norwich and hasn't looked back Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 They are going to find it very tough against Wigan, I can tell you! We are after a spot in Europe this season, you know. Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 As long as you do your best to beat Chelsea, Arsenal, City and the Pool pie-eater. Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 I see Fergie splashing out on that Gea fella keeper. Sticking his neck out this year with these buys I think. Link to post Share on other sites
grungy-gonads 54 Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 Well we need the refresh so I'm happy to see it happen. Hopefully a few more coming in. Fergie usually makes good decisions*. (* Yes no need to remind me about Djemba Djemba and all!) Link to post Share on other sites
bobby12 0 Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 "Will they gel?" cry all. Link to post Share on other sites
big-will 7 Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 Or even, will they blend? Link to post Share on other sites
scouser 4 Posted June 28, 2011 Author Share Posted June 28, 2011 All I know is that this year, it will be our season. Link to post Share on other sites
scouser 4 Posted June 29, 2011 Author Share Posted June 29, 2011 Gerrard: "We will win something soon". Sadly, no mention of it being our year. Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Oh he's got at least a month to come up with that line, scouser. I'm sure he won't disappoint. Link to post Share on other sites
rach 1 Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 I have been busy and not really following the news so don't really know much about these 3 new buys of United. But in Fergie we trust! Weekends just aren't the same without the football. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I know!! Got my telly, now just waiting for the bloody footy to start. Tried watching some J-League on it, but damn that footy is crap. Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Definitely. Always great on coming back from the UK in summer and the footie starting. Of course, I'm disappointed quite soon as we start to lose! Link to post Share on other sites
big-will 7 Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 If all the papers are to be believed ( ), Arsenal won't be in the PL this coming season as they will have sold all their players. Link to post Share on other sites
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