badmigraine 0 Posted February 21, 2003 Share Posted February 21, 2003 In response to Enderzero's inquiry in the Pension Refund thread, here is an explanation of the difference between a JET and and Expat, as seen through the lens of a Penthouse Forum letter: THE JET "Dear Penthouse Forum I am a student at a large, midwestern university, and until now, I never believed that the letters to Penthouse Forum were true...that is, until last Friday night. I was studying late in the virtually-deserted library stacks, cursing the fate that had me writing yet another paper while all my roommates were out drinking, when I noticed a beautiful blonde studying just two carrels over. She had a tight body with oh-so-nicely-sized melons, the tops of which peeked provacatively over her sorority tank-top. Over the course of the next hour, I stole several secret--or so I thought--glances at her, letting my mind run over various fantasies involving the overstuffed leather armchairs in the reading room, or the private, smoked-glass cubicles reserved for Graduate School study, and my love sausage was growing painfully hard under my jeans when suddenly the girl looked me right in eyes and smiled. "Hey, aren't you in my Phallocentrism and Oral Culture study group?" she asked, standing up to reveal the tightest pair of Daisy Dukes this Economics major has ever seen... [section graphically describing sex on the floor of the library stacks deleted] ...so that is my story, Forum, and I am sorry I ever doubted you. From now on, count me as another true believer...and see you in the library next Friday night! THE EXPAT Dear Penthouse Forum I am a manager at a large, midwestern company, and until now, I never believed that the letters to Penthouse Forum were true...that is, until last Friday night. I was working late in the virtually-deserted head offices, cursing the fate that had me writing yet another management report while all my colleagues were out drinking, when I noticed a beautiful blonde making copies in the break room. She had a tight body with oh-so-nicely-sized melons, the tops of which peeked provacatively out from under her prim but saucily-unbuttoned white silk blouse. She kept returning over the course of the next hour to make more copies, and each time she did, I stole secret--or so I thought--glances at her, letting my mind run over various fantasies involving the overstuffed leather armchairs in the executive lounge, or the private, smoked-glass conference rooms reserved for sensitive client meetings, and my love sausage was growing painfully hard under my suit pants when suddenly the girl looked me right in eyes and smiled. "Hey, aren't you working on the Fiscal 2002 Customs/Duty Drawback Task Force with Dick Johnson and Harry Wang?" she asked, turning to open the slit in her blue skirt and revealing the silkiest pair of work panties this Accounting Department manager has ever seen... [section graphically describing sex on the floor of the office break room deleted] ...so that is my story, Forum, and I am sorry I ever doubted you. From now on, count me as another true believer...and see you in the office next Friday night! Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean11 0 Posted February 21, 2003 Share Posted February 21, 2003 It used to be much more clearly defined in the days of the Royal Navy and extra-territorial status. "Just you try to apply your laughable laws, and we'll sink your ships and flatten your ports." Sometimes I feel a deep nostalgia for those days long past... Link to post Share on other sites
badmigraine 0 Posted February 21, 2003 Author Share Posted February 21, 2003 As a boy, I'd steal my brother's Playboy mags and look at all the pictures and read the blurbs about the girls. They were all about 20 years old. I thought: "When I reach 20, I'll have one of those girls..." Next month, I'll reach 40. Assuming my math is correct, I'll have two of those girls... Link to post Share on other sites
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