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nagpants

SnowJapan Member
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Posts posted by nagpants

  1. I have no idea where this comes from (apart from a friend) but it made me chuckle

     

    ----

     

    To my farty boss and his bowels.

     

    I hear you.

     

    I hear you in there.

     

    I hear you farting. Shifting in your leather chair. Trying to muffle your bodily noises in your vibrating chair pad (which is creepy enough).

     

    Worse: I smell you.

     

    The first day you did this, I thought someone had burned a Lean Cuisine Salisbury Steak in the microwave. The second day, I stupidly asked you if you smelled "that vile odor".

     

    You blushed and said, "I have this little problem when I am stressed, excited, or eat a lot of protein in the mornings..." and thus began the Awkward Relationship I Have With Your Bowels.

     

    Man, I am your assistant. I can help with the stress factor, that's sort of my purpose. But listen, can't you lay off the protein bars and egg whites and ostrich sausage in the mornings? Can you eat them, say, at lunch or at night, and torture your family and pets with the resulting stench?

     

    I am tired of burning candles in my office like I'm trying to ward off the Samhain Fart Satyr. I dread bringing you files because I don't ALWAYS hear you and sometimes am very unpleasantly surprised by the greasy cloud that surrounds your work area.

     

    I really like you. You're a great boss. You take great care of me. But this has to stop before I burst a blood vessel in my eye from holding my breath when I come close to you. See a gastroenterological specialist already; I'll even make the appointment!

  2. Whats this dude/ette saying about the crows?

     

    初めて書き込みさせていただきます。(パソコン 351;って書き込みするのも初めてです)

    最近いつもと違うな?と感じることがあります。

    空に地震雲と見られるものが多く夕焼けも赤っぽ 356;です。

    私は伊勢市に住んでいるのですが実家のある志摩 398;ほうではセミが鳴いていて伊勢では鳴いていませ ん。

    最近の夜は虫や蛙の鳴き声がすごいのですが昨日 399;鳴いていませんでした(これは少し寒くなったせ いかな?

    そして昨日はカラスの行動が少しおかしかったで 377;。

    くちばしを何回も電線に擦り付けるのです。

    行ってしまったなぁと思ってもまた戻ってきて何 238;も擦り付けていました。

    少し前コウモリがたくさん飛んでいたけど昨日は# 211;かけていません。

    そしてたまに聞こえる地鳴りのような音

    親が漁師なのですが一昨日の水揚げは少ないです 397;。

    というか昨年から海の様子おかしいみたいなので 377;が・・・魚はあまり釣れてないですね

    鰹にいたってはかなり漁場は遠いようです。(鯨 420;イルカは沖でよく見かけるようです)

     

    長々書いてしまってすみません。

    あまりにも気になって書き込みしてしまいました 290;

  3. That's how many mainly middle-aged Japanese women went (all together!) on some Yon-sama tour to South Korea recently, some kind of filming he was doing for a new movie.

     

    It was on the news last night. In the same piece they were appauled at the fact that some South Korea restaurants now have signs outside saying "No Japanese admitted" (because of the squabbles over that island). Everyone seemed horrified that such a thing could happen. They didn't mention of course the "No Gaijin" signs that can sometimes be found here....

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