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 Quote:
Originally posted by Ocean11:
Time is our servant, and not the other way round.
if that were true for all, our world would be nicer place. times most certainly serves us, but allowing it do so means giving it some authority.

i freely admit keeping time is highly functional, but personally the times in my life when i foresake all knowledge of time are definitely the best.

i love not knowing what day it is, i especially enjoy being wrong by more than one day \:\)

if i could develop a lifestyle more conducive to this, i would (well i would at least put it forward for consideration).

if others can live with this freedom on more regular basis, i am not going to be the one to tell them to give it up...they'll be plenty of others only too willing do it
:p

(now i must get ready, cos the clock says i will soon hit the threshhold that dictates the comfortable pre-work preparation time has elapsed, and the rush will be on... \:\) )
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I think, maybe, the issue here is getting confused.

 

Time, as we are discussing it here, is a tool for interaction. Time allows us to 'value' the time of others.

 

I hate keeping to a clock, so I have a flexible work schedule, i'm independent from others at work, and rock up and leave at will. I rarely arrange to meet people because I like to keep my schedule free from time commitments. Because I value freedom from time so highly, when I do make arrangements with others, I have to respect the sacrifice they are making to their own time freedom, and expect it in return.

 

It's all about respect for others.

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sounds like a good compromise, miteyak...

 

i guess, ive just noticed my (quite particular) life improved when i paid less heed to time, and i wondered if others might benefit from a similar change in disposition...

 

it certainly sounds like enough people are annoyed by the issue.

 

im outie wave.gif

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No no no.

 

If you say `i will be there at 6pm` then you have to go there at 6pm. It is wrong not to. It is very rude and inconsiderate not to.

 

There was this time when a guy called me and asked me to do him a favour. I was busy, but said `ok`. He told me he`d be outside appleland in ten mins. I rushed there to meet him, but had to wait an hour before he showed up. That is incredibly rude, and I thought a lot less of him from then on.

 

Moral of the story:

 

Keep your promises and dont assume other people will be cool about you keeping them waiting. They may very well get pissed off at you.

 

It is not difficult to be on time. Its just a a matter of respect for other people - thinking aobut them rather than just putting your own damn self first all the time. If something important comes up, then fair enough give your mate a call and say I am gonna be late. But otherwise have some consideration.

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Mikazooki - your casual and relaxed approach to the use of time is to be applauded. Truly we all could reflect upon this with great benefit. Many cultures are not so time obsessed - manyana, manyana!!

However I stick by my belief esp. in the context of time, that taking what is not given is stealing. Waiting for a little time breaks no one (almost), waiting indefinitely is taking. We don't usually arrange to give 1 hour, 2 hours,3 hours.....of our time for waiting. Numbing oneself to the task, doesn't change the fact. This society operates on the premise of reasonable punctuality, as does my home country oz, so while flowing within that premise, we should try to cause as minimal suffering to others as possible, I think.

I love freedom from the constraints of time and I love flexibility in my life, but while engaging with others, the other half matters.

Oops, almost 2:00 - siesta time. \:\)

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 Quote:
Originally posted by mikazooki:


and dont consider these people thieves or villains. they r not stealing your time. u ARE giving it by waiting. if u dont want to wait you are free to leave.

zooki - I like your thoughts and feelings and I agree with the above quote. However, if I give of something limited, if I make a gift of my time then it hurts when that gift is squandered by a friend and it annoys me when it is squandered by an acquaintance/associate.

Please lend me your car. I will return it dirty and muddy with chocolate melted on the seat, an empty tank and whoops, I forgot to top up the radiator even though I know the car has an overheating problem. Did I appreciate your gift?

I should say that people are always late on me. I never care about it as I am usually happy to see them. What annoys me is when people speak a commitment without thinking. It doesn't have to be a time to meet, any promise to act (I will call you tomorrow, I will pay the bill, etc). It shows that they just aren't listening and do not really care. I used to have a terrible habit of putting to much anticipation on what my friends appeared to have committed to me. Often I would hang my hat on their word. To me, telling someone that you will meet at a certain time is the kind of thing I hung my hat on. Even if it was 5 days in advance, I would spend the whole week knowing that I would see my mate spotty at 4pm Sunday. That is what I was doing. It meant something to me. I eventually learnt not to attach much meaning to the committed event, which was a sad loss of enthusiasm.

People in this world speak to easily as they feel comfortable saying something that they think the other person wants to hear. "I will see you today at 1pm" resolves the feeling of compliance with another person's needs. The sayer-without-thinking person feels reconciled in the moment and the person who is excited and hangs the hat feels something negative when they are still standing around at 3pm.
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im innie wave.gif

 

yes, tis indeed unwise to be disrepectful of another's gift (something else i have been privvy to), and a drawback if one can't be relied upon. and when forced to negatives i can say that tardiness will cause trouble for those unable to adapt, and this has been the case amongst my friends. those able to be both tardy and punctual have achieved material success and happiness. to these people (and a lesser extent me) social tardiness is an adaptation to group dynamics and accepted behaviour. those to whom lateness is an inherent trait encounter more challenges.

 

my envy comes from a belief in toaist values - but an inability to put them into practice - and the perception that these people embody these beliefs more than most. [please note i am not referring to airy, vague hippy types, although they may also be nice people]

 

i still argue (on somewhat unstable ground) that lack of consideration for others is not a dominant factor in the personalities of perpetual late doers (again excluding the crap of heart). and a certain patience is involved in dealing with such personalities, but the end result can be most rewarding.

 

i better stop here, cos i feel a little like i'm arguing a special personal case, that does not expand into the realms of others. just sticking up for the guys i whined at for so long.

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oo, no... i have one more thing to add.

 

i can think of two examples of people who turned the corner and did away with their laissez faire attitude, and i think have suffered from the change. still cool people, but i would have to say less fun. some people might call this growing up :p

 

maybe it is \:\(

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Yep just be on time-I mean how difficult is it really? 10 minutes late is no biggie I guess but if you're really lax about time you should let other people know how unreliable you are in reality before you make an appointment to meet. I think the solution is to just not wait for people who piss about beyond your own particular threshold of waitability. I can handle timewaster friends but I won't wait round for them-why should I? People are either into being on time or they're not-both are fine, different strokes etc but I think it's pretty rude to keep people waiting under the false pretense that you're going to be there.

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Yeah I think there is a big difference between 10 mins and 30mins. Also location is a factor: If someone is standing outside a station for 15mins waiting for you then that is bad. If you are picking up the person from their house and you are 15 mins late then thats no biggie.

 

Also depends on how many people there are. If there are 8 people then being late is bad. If its just meeting your mate at a restaurant then being 15 mins late isnt the end of the world.

 

Also depends on how well you know the person. If they are my good buddy then meeting them at kappa sushi 10 mins late isnt so bad but if youre on a date or something then Id make sure I was there on time.

 

Work is a different matter. Im always on time for work. It helps living 30 sec walk away!

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