Jump to content

Recommended Posts

whadaya fink?

 

r those who live by the clock virtuous or victims of society?

 

please show a bit of spirit and bash those of differing opinions. its not fun unless we can gang up on someone.

Link to post
Share on other sites

In my case you have to always allow for the "zwelgen factor". It is approx 10 mins so if I say Ill be there at 8 you can bet a lot of money it will be 8:10, but the zwelgen factor does not apply to skiing, then I am right on time and sometimes even early.

Link to post
Share on other sites

meeting people is really what i was thinking about.

 

in all the countries i have lived, the friends i make and keep seem to share the collective inability to be anywhere even close to the organised time. about an hour late seems standard (on occasion even when the plan is "lets meet in 10mins from now")

 

before i realised it was me choosing these people to be my friends, i was upset by the constant tardiness. now i have accepted it i feel more relaxed about time in general and late has become normal. i subsequently see those who become distressed when someone is late as the ones with the problem, not the late doers.

 

to punctual people then, i have become the most evil of villains, committing the most scornworthy of acts...being late.

 

i note this after a long argument on the virtues of tardiness with the gf - after which we arrived 1 and a half hours late to a meet a friend whose birthday we were to celebrate. after a further hour at his house, we made it to the bar for his party, and were pretty much the last ones to arrive. all in all a pretty standard timetable.

 

sound familiar?

Link to post
Share on other sites

im usually consistently on time when meeting friends and i get pretty agravated at the people who roll on in when ever it suits them, especially seeing as i live out in the boonies and dont drive and most of them live pretty central. i think its the fact that i make allowances and know i have to leave 40 mins before i need to be anywhere and they make allowances for me because i live so far away, so they will only start leaving once im already at the designated meeting spot.

Link to post
Share on other sites

If i'm meeting someone, i'm always on time. Likewise, i expect people i am meeting to be on time. It gives me the shits when people are constantly late for things. The odd late apperance is fine, but i know a couple of people who are late 100% of the time. Very annoying.

 

Party's a bit different though. Everyone tends to turn up "fashionably late". So i don't bust my balls to get there on time cause there is going to be heaps of people there anyway and they aren't waiting for me.

 

If it's a small group going somewhere then I'm on time so i don't hold everyone up.

Link to post
Share on other sites

the reason u (the general u) get angry when u r waiting for someone is because u r waiting for someone.

 

the first trick in time relaxation is never wait.

 

u should always have some auxiliary activity with u to fill in this idle time. i find the people who r late for me, are never angry when i am late for them, and when i arrive, they never seem to have neen waiting.

 

once u have mastered this u will never scowl at your friends again.

 

of course if your life is heavily timetabled, this may dictate that people of such a disposition are not befriendable. but u should try the non-scowl technique.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I have pretty bad time perception, so I'm a disaster when it comes to being places on time...

 

Most of my friends and family are aware of this, and cut me loads of slack, but it pisses people off anyway. Shoganai... (damn! I said it)

Link to post
Share on other sites

It's just as easy to be on time as it is to be late. Conversely, it's just as hard to be late as it is to be on time.

 

If you have all these things you can do while waiting (I like to blow bubbles of spit), then you can do them while waiting at the appointed spot for the appointed time to roll around.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't really scowl at my mates when they are late. There is just no need for it really, it's just wasted time. Plus i think it's rude if someone makes a habit of being late.

 

I think i will have to take up thumb twidling. Thats nice and constructive!

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm the same as most of ya!

 

I'm a real time keeper. if we're meeting at 8pm at such and such a station then it's 8pm that we gotta meet.

 

I mean, ya can't campai until everyone's arrived right!?

Link to post
Share on other sites

It used to drive me crazy, I'd always be early. When one's busy, wasting time seems like a crime.

 

Anyway, thank god for the mobile phone. No more waiting... Someone's not on time I just bugger off without them and leave them a message ... (occasionally to the chagrin of the offender in question ...)

Link to post
Share on other sites

Virtuous!! If you've got an agreed upon time to meet/be somewhere...be there! Being late is sometimes unavoidable (for whatever reasons) but when possible be on time! "casually late" is not cool mad.gif

Link to post
Share on other sites

Long ago on a buddhist sojourn, in England of all places, being late was explained by the guru? as "An act of stealing". I think his actual words were "Taking that which is not freely given". This has nothing to do with "Time = Money" concept. Simply, time has it's own intrinsic value and is not their for the personal taking from others. So Lateness = Stealing. \:D

Link to post
Share on other sites

There is indeed few things ruder or more selfish than someone saying "sure, I will be there at 3pm" without a moments consideration of the time and space involved. I do not care if someone is late if they are coming along way or by complicated means (for example, via Shinjuku Station!). I do care if the lateness was a result of zero consideration.

 

I have a friend in Oz that would say "sure, I will see you then". I used to suggest stupid times to meet to see if he was even thinking about the time/space equation. Most of the time it would not even cross his mind that I had suggested a time that was physically impossible. I would always point this out to emphasise the matter and then we would set a perfectly do-able time to meet. This guy would rock up late by an hour and say that he had to put his washing on. The sad fact is, that is probably what he was doing as I was standing in the cold. He would just decide to do something and bugger anyone else if it made him 1 hour late. I lived with guy for a while. We would both agree that we had to make happy hour at the local... we had 2 hours. With 10 minutes remaining I would be hounding him as he decided that he wanted bacon and eggs for dinner. We often missed happy hour.

 

I have another mate that would arrange to meet me and never show up. He wasn't just late, he was not coming. I would ring and ask what was going on and he would be at some bar somewhere or another and suggest I swing by with a jovial "sorry mate, I forgot, damn, thats right, 10pm at the Grand."

Link to post
Share on other sites

whoa, he-veee man...

 

i feel kinda torn knowing i was once persistantly irrate at what i perceived to be inconsiderate people disrupting my life by always being late.

 

but i now accept it. this is the way my friends are, and its one of the things which must contribute to me thinking they are great people, cos i now have friends in 3 different countries, all with the same faults.

 

these people are just like this. it is difficult to convey to them why being late is such an issue, because many just dont see it. (i do have one friend who is consistantly apologetic, but he is nevertheless, always late).

 

i hold no malice at all to these people. i like their laid back attitude. i wish i could always be so relaxed.

 

my friends are exactly the people (well the washing dude, at least) db describes , and far from being idiots, they are all wonderful people, free from (what i think of as) the hang-ups of modern life. and contrary to oceans earlier point, it is not easy these people to be on time. ive watched it. in their zone time takes on a different quality, and trying to make them hurry is wasted effort.

 

i once arrived a 10 oclock to encourage a late doer to prepare early for breakfast (we needed to arrive before 11:30). to my great frustration we did not leave until after 11:30 and arrived at 11:50. the kind breakfast people then allowed us to clean up their $25 buffet gig for $5 each.

 

this just seems to happen my friends. they worry not, because things always seem to work out fine anyway (at least as they perceive).

 

i know the example may seem extreme, and usu a missed start is a missed start and a big disappointment. especially if u have been very keen on something. but in the life of the late, there is always something else to do.

 

the moral then is dont rely on such people if its important to be on time (lift to the airport kinda thing). but dont disregard them because they fail to conform to a (seemingly widely held) belief that being on time is a necessity.

 

and dont consider these people thieves or villains. they r not stealing your time. u ARE giving it by waiting. if u dont want to wait you are free to leave.

 

i guess in the end it comes down to what is permissable in your lifestyle. to those with tight schedules there is little way of getting round the fact that dealing with lateness is extremely frustrating. and this will exclude u from close attachment to a perpetual late doer - which for u may be of no great loss. but if u can spare the time, and find something to numb the wait time, embrace these people, for they know a lot about life that is difficult for the blinkered to grasp.

 

[such is my opinion, and it may be biased my experience with admirable people, and in no way deems that it is not poosible for some people to be late as a result of all-pervading crapness...however, this crapness should make itself known in ways beyond the lateness. hence, my position that lateness is not a good way to judge a persons character]

Link to post
Share on other sites

No, it's just a stubborn perversion. I've known an otherwise admirable person who was always late and it undermined nearly all his goodness and effectiveness. He just didn't want to give up his freedom to a clock, which was his perverse way of formulating the whole point of time.

 

Time is our servant, and not the other way round. But we have to allow servants to serve us. You can choose not to be served at a time of your choosing, but refusing service all the time is not really a choice at all.

 

Accepting that you're going to be late when it's unavoidable and not worrying about it is surely a useful ability though.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...