Jump to content

Recommended Posts

I could use a little levity right now.

 

My best friend, buddy, partner in fun... my dog Tio has suddenly fallen lame. He's paralyzed from the middle back down and we don't know why. Nothing makes any sense given his age (1 year) and lack of any trauma... All the vets around here are perplexed. It's not looking good for him right now. We have a consult and MRI scheduled with a nerve specialist in Saitama on Saturday but I'm not expecting a miracle. I feel a tough decision coming up pretty quick here. Anyway, I won't bum you guys out any more ..but damn I could use a giggle right now.. :(

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 272
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

A Blond woman goes to the hospital. "What seems to be the problem?" asked the Doctor. "Something is terribly wrong, I keep finding postage stamps from Costa Rica in my Vagina." The Doctor had a lo

The current banking crisis explained by an Irishman.   Young Paddy bought a donkey from a farmer for £100.   The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.   The next day he drove up a

This might cheer you up   On a bitterly cold winter morning a husband and wife in Dublin were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 i

Yes...it's pretty amazing the relationship we have with them. Truly man's best friend. My wife who wasn't a pet person at all is the most devastated. She's pretty busted up about it and is willing to spend whatever it takes to save him. I'm a little more practical and will pull the reigns if quality of life is at all compromised.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey...thanks guys!! Much appreciated. How about some F'in jokes though eh!! :wave: haha...... We got a nice gesture from my mother in law today...a "grant" to spend on whatever is needed within reason of course. Essentially a blank cheque. Should he be a candidate for surgery the bill will be...umm....LARGE!! My wife wants to give it a shot.

Link to post
Share on other sites

This might cheer you up

 

On a bitterly cold winter morning a husband and wife in Dublin were

listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say,

"We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your

car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the Snow ploughs can get

through."

 

So the good wife went out and moved her car.

 

 

A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio

announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today.

You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the

snow ploughs can get through." The good wife went out and moved her car

again.

 

 

The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio

announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today.

You must park...." Then the electric power went out. The good wife was

very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "I don't

know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the

snow ploughs can get through?"

 

Then with the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are

married to blondes exhibit, the husband replied,

 

"Why don't you just leave the bloody car in the garage this time."

 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

ご注意

 

Everyone!

 

Your suggesting fab ways to laugh, please be careful. Any incentitvety that have insulted the aboriginal races of both Japan and Australia on this forum is not good.

 

On doing so, the people are a disgrace to their children's indigious ancestry and the children of Mr Adam Goodes.

 

They need to be is censed and apologise issue.

Link to post
Share on other sites

sad about your best friend. I had a best friend for 15yrs . Im sure they have checked, but just saying , my dog had a similar problem, I found a tick on her. They cause the same symptoms. But we are in SubTropical climate.in Australia.... Hope things work out..

Link to post
Share on other sites

Their were two men sitting in a pub having a drink...

The first man brought his cat with him and had it sitting on a stool next to him...

The second man had brought his elephant with him and had it sitting down next to him...

The first man said to the second man, "hey my cat is really clever she can do lot of different tricks, would you like to see?"

Sure said the second man

So the first man tells his cat to stand on one leg, and it does...

Impressive said the second man.

Spin on your head the first man tells his cat, and sure enough it spins on its head...

Wow your cat has talent, says the second man, but my elephant is also very clever, would you like to see?

Sure said the first man...

Ok get your cat to lay down on the floor..

With this the first man asks his cat so go and lay on the floor, which it does willingly...

Now said the second man to the first man... my elephant can f*** your cat...

No way said the first man, that would be really impressive if he could do that...

so the second man tells his elephant to jump onto the cat...

Which the elephant happily obliges.....

See your cat is f***ed!!!!

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Awesome...stuff!! :wave:

 

ManfredK....believe me, Lyme Disease was the first thing I thought of but the vet just kinda blew me off about that... slightly different symptoms I guess. Also, previously he was checked for heartworms which tests for Lyme as well. :wakaranai:

Link to post
Share on other sites

An eccentric man hired another to build him a house, with two conditions: He had to build it in one week, and using exactly 1,000 bricks, no more, no less.

He would pay 1 million dollars if the pile of 1,000 bricks that he would supply was completely used up, with no other bricks added. Otherwise, he would pay nothing.

 

The house builder figured, hey, easy money, this guy is even supplying the building materials. Deal!

 

And so he labored day after day, painstakingly putting the house together. At the end of the week, with 5 minutes to go before the deadline, he finished up, and while wiping his brow saw the eccentric man coming down the street. Jus then, he noticed that one of the bricks from the pile was still unused.

 

Panicking, he scrambled to find somewhere to put the brick.

Just as the owner arrived, he hit upon a brilliant idea:

 

He threw it away!

 

 

Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok, how about a dog-related one:

 

A woman was riding on a bus, with her toy poodle in her lap.

A man was sitting across the aisle from her, smoking a cigar.

The woman glowered at him, and asked him to put out his cigar.

He refused.

She asked the bus driver to do something about it, but he refused to get involved.

Getting furious, she grabbed the cigar out of the man's mouth, and threw it out the window of the bus.

 

The man, in return, grabbed her poodle, and threw IT out the window of the bus!

 

Pulling the emergency stop, she screamed and ran to the door.

As soon as the bus stopped, she jumped out, and started running back down the road, calling out for her dog.

 

Finally, around the bend, appeared her dog, running towards her and wagging its tail.

...but... what on earth was that it was holding in its mouth...??

 

The brick.

 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...