NoFakie 45 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 This just shows how people can be duped. There must be some weak-willed or super materialistic parents out there to let things like this get inflicted on their kids. Lasers at your wedding on the other hand sounds cool! Just so long as I'm not paying. Link to post Share on other sites
pie-eater 207 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 Sharks with lasers! Link to post Share on other sites
BagOfCrisps 24 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 Sharks with lasers! Haven't seen him in quite a while! Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 we dispensed with half of the goofy stuff and put those funds toward having a nice honeymoon. That's what we did as well....kept the money for a damn good honeymoon. We also told our Japanese guests that we weren't going to be sending them thank you gifts for their large gift and for them to adjust their gift accordingly Link to post Share on other sites
BagOfCrisps 24 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 The peeps fight back. Wonder if more couples do that, or is it just a 'half of the couple is a gaijin who hates that nonsense' thing? Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 Maybe, at the wedding place I kiboshed all sorts of extra tacky (and costly) nonsense.....photographer (I got my own), videographer (who actually enjoys watching other people's wedding vids??), fancy video screens showing pics of how we met, when we were young etc etc (we made our own collage as a welcome board) and a lot of other silly details I can't remember now Link to post Share on other sites
Saitaman 1 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 The whole expensive gift and then expensive reciprocal gift thing here really does my head in. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 It's ridiculous.....just take off a couple of man and leave it as my gift! Link to post Share on other sites
@tokyo 14 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 What % value of the original gift should the return gift be? Is there 'guidelines' for that kind of thing too? Link to post Share on other sites
Go Native 70 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 We asked everyone at our wedding to donate some money to our bathroom renovation fund. We ended up with enough to finish the bathroom and pay for the honeymoon. Wish I could get married more often! Link to post Share on other sites
@tokyo 14 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 Sounds like an idea! Link to post Share on other sites
yamayamayama 2 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 What % value of the original gift should the return gift be? Is there 'guidelines' for that kind of thing too? Dont know if it is related, but there definitely seems to be a value to gifts/money, depending on the relationship.. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 My MiL said its around 20% Link to post Share on other sites
ProbablyaCrazyPerson 2 Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 Seems low. I know my lady friend seems to take 20000 or 30000 yen to a wedding of someone she knows. The stuff she brings back is worth more than that, though often ultimately close to useless. They should just give her some money back. Link to post Share on other sites
NoFakie 45 Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I have limited knowledge of this, but I don't think you can take 20000 because that's 2 man which is an even number. It goes from 1 man to 3 man to 5 man. Which makes it even more ridiculous. When we had our wedding we charged 1 man a head. It was a compromise so we could get the gaijins to pay while not making the Japanese feel bad about not paying. Our return gift was about 800 yen. We got married at a hotel and the 1 man only covered the food, which was the cheapest option. The money we got from my wife's relatives basically covered the rest. Of course her mam and dad had forked out the same or more at relative's weddings over the years so it kind of evened out this time. I don't think you should spend anything like a fortune, but its good to have a wedding. Its an important moment in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Karnidge 2 Posted May 14, 2013 Author Share Posted May 14, 2013 I find the whole present culture here way over the top. Having said that, back home I find it rather the opposite, with shoddy packing and so much less thought put into everything. Too much time in Japan perhaps. Somewhere in the middle would be good. Link to post Share on other sites
Tubby Beaver 209 Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 We broke even on the money we spent on the wedding, which was nice. It was like a savings account and I got a nice large sum to splurge on a honeymoon etc Link to post Share on other sites
JA2340 16 Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 Twice married - both times minimal fuss First one was just my mum, my sister and my landlady as witnesses. The civil celebrant was the only other person there. That one ended when wifey up and carked it. Second was celebrant's receptionist as witness, celebrant the only other person there. That one ended when I up and left - too much nag, nag, nag! All this presents and expensive wedding shit is simply a waste of time and money! Currently longer with my partner than with both of the previous combined. Legally, we might as well be married - there's no difference regarding distribution of effects in the case of separation. But, after 18 years, I guess we're settled! Link to post Share on other sites
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