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I used to tell my wife frequently. Growing up it was never said in the house. I always found it odd that my parents didn't say it?!? Both my brother and sister say it to their kids. Never - ever - heard the Japanese in-laws say it!

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  • 2 years later...

I say it to my wife and daughter sometimes, but not really into using the words "I love you" so much never have been.

Never really use it with my folks back home, or to my bro in Australia either!

It was never really used in my family when I were young and my wife although she does say "I love you" to me, doesn't really use it and her family certainly don't, it is not the Japanese way!

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I say it to my missus.....parents, bro's and sister....mates....shit, I love you guys!! I'd pretty much say it to everyone except Celtic n The Rangers fans, perhaps cockney w@nks....perhaps more

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To +1, every evening (at least) before "lights out". Sometimes more often. At the foot of every email we exchange during the day.

To parents, every time I leave them (visit infrequently, because of my work).

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I never ever say it. If i find myself saying it, theres a genuine chance that im not entirely compos mentis. And then i will hate and detest myself for emotionally abusing the object of my affection. In addition i never say osaki ni shisturei shimasu in a loud voice. I do say it, but quietly and so that only me and maybe one other teacher (near the door that hears me) are in on it. I always feel like the big osaki ni is massively attention whoring like youre suggesting "look at me! ive worked THIIIIISSSSS hard! now adulate!" And then you get all the forced otsukares. And it makes my skin crawl.

 

It bothers me.

 

But then so does walking. I have an ass that wiggles. Im super camp when i walk. Its also a huge spacehopper ass. So as soon as i walk past someone i find moderately attractive my back tightens up and i start having a monologue in my head that goes as follows;

 

Youre tightening up.

Now youre walking stupid.

They can see you walking stupid. Are you springing?

Walk properly.

Stop thinking about walking ffs.

Jesus christ! youre just walking!

You cant even do that properly.

What the hell is up with you?

Shut up shut up shut up!

So how do you walk again...

Am i doing it correctly now?

It doesnt feel right?

Weird shit! how do you not know how to walk???

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FNU5FnxOxLY

 

The point is that i find it really hard to say something (particularly heartfelt) without my brain staying out of it long enough to let me enjoy the magnanimity. Immediately ill have the cavalcade of doubt and self hatred filling my head as i realise, once again, im an asshole for even thinking i could for one tiny moment say something sincere and genuine without it coming back to what i have to gain from it.

 

"For hard men, intimacy is a thing of shame - but also something precious".

 

Ive felt that to be true from the very first moment i read it.

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Jaysus, ippy!! That's waaay too much information for this tiny brain to process at one time.

 

FFS, walking is natural, just do it (to paraphrase the shoe mob) Why does it bother you what the people you are walking past think? They are more than likely not concerned with you at all, and more absorbed with their own little foibles.

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Ippy why are you at all bothered by what others think?

More than likely they are not taking a scrap of notice to you anyway.

 

That is something that never bothers me and never will. I don't give a toss what others think of me, thats their problem. I am who I am and built as I am, what people think of how I look couldn't care less. Although I am sure they are not taking any notice to me anyway, like they are not taking any notice of you either!

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